Page 10 of Shattered Illusions (Ashryn Barker 1)

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I reply. I’m still not ready to accept it. I may never be ready. Then again, it would just be sex. But no. That’s not how I wanted it to work. Despite it all, I’m a little bit of a romantic. I always imagined a new hunter would come to the guild, about my age, and sweep me off my feet.

Ridiculous I know. I’m not a little girl anymore. Really, I’ve never had a chance to just be a little girl. So I should know better than wanting all that romance and fairy tale stuff.

“Of course you don’t.” He sounds amused, and I’m not sure how to actually deal with it.

“I’m not sleeping with you,” I blurt out, and he looks even more amused, which I wouldn’t have thought was possible.

“I wouldn’t expect you too. I’m not the kind of man that forces anyone to do something they don’t want to,” he answers earnestly. And I believe him. There’s a sincerity about it that can’t be faked even by the most accomplished of liars. I like it. I could use a lot more honesty in my life.

I frown at that thought. It was odd to think it, but even since waking up the first time, no one here has lied to me. Yet people in the outside world, definitely have. It’s not quite processing for me correctly.

I’m saved from answering by the door swinging open, and for the first time since Remus cut my clothes off, I realise I’m naked. My arms fly to cover my chest as Dimitri storms into the room. Oddly, his expression doesn’t quite match his movements.

He’s not looking at me in the same way Remus is, though there’s definitely some interest behind them.

“I see you met our resident doctor,” he says, giving Remus an amused look.

“You’re a doctor?” I ask the scarred man, and he nods his head.

“I was before I was turned too. I must say, the other vampires are a lot more accepting of me than the humans were.” He waves towards his face, and corresponding dread fills me. Humans can be so cruel. Anyone can be so cruel.

“I’m sorry,” I say automatically.

“Why? Were you one of those people?”

I shake my head. He’s right, it wasn’t me that acted that way, therefore being sorry now is a waste of everyone’s time. But I don’t like the idea of him being sad. It just isn’t right.

I reach a hand out to comfort him, before remembering I’m naked again and covering myself with it. Remus chuckles. I don’t know what about him has me so comfortable.

“Exactly. You can’t change the past, Ashryn.”

The way he says my name sends tingles through me. I like it a lot. But more than that, I like his words. They’re true. You can’t change the past, even if you want to. And right now, that’s something I really have to accept. I’m never going to be human again.

Weirdly, that doesn’t make me feel quite as bad as it should.

“Are you ready to meet the others?” Dimitri asks. He’s still watching me intently, but his expression has changed a little. Now there’s a curiosity to it. Probably a result of watching my interaction with Remus.

I need to get the other vampire to meet my eyes. Then I can see his secret, and try and get a better measure of him. Hmm. That’s odd. I’ve never tried to get

anyone to look me in the eyes before. I don’t normally want to know these things. But maybe, in my head, it will help build the trust between us.

I want to trust a vampire. Huh. That’s an odd realisation.

“Okay, I’ll meet the others,” I say. I’m not completely sure I’m ready to, but I can’t put it off forever, and maybe it’ll help me start to work everything out.

“I’ll leave you to get dressed. Remus will bring you down in a bit.”

“Thank you,” I answer, relieved he’s leaving so I can actually change. Remus, not a problem, though now I know he’s a doctor, that could be why. It takes a certain kind of person to be a doctor and emanating trust is one of them. At least, as far as I’m concerned it is.

He leaves the two of us alone, and Remus holds out a towel for me. I finally leave the cold water, my skin feeling surprisingly refreshed. Looks like they know what they’re doing.

I hope they do about me meeting other vampires too. What if Dimitri and Remus aren’t the only ones who know who I am?

Being a vampire hunter probably isn’t going to help me here. Quite the opposite. I may need to be very, very careful.

Chapter Six

The room is beyond full with people, and all of them are looking at me. They have expressions ranging from curious, to almost hostile, and I don’t like either. I don’t want to be the centre of attention. Particularly not the attention of the angry ones.