Page 96 of All That We Are Together
“You don’t have to lie.”
He tried not to smile and adjusted his cuffs before grabbing a drink off the tray of a passing waiter.
“I’ve never had a knack for putting up with swollen egos.”
“Are there a lot of those here?” I took away his drink.
“Honestly, I don’t know how these four walls can contain them.”
I tried to suppress my giggling when Hans came over to congratulate us. The public and his friends had praised my work. I felt an unavoidable satisfaction. He looked at my painting again, nodding without realizing it.
“This is promising work indeed. Good girl.”
I noticed a slight change in Axel’s expression as Hans walked away to greet some acquaintances, but I wasn’t sure what it meant.
86
Axel
It was nighttime when the exhibition ended. Hans insisted we go to dinner with him and some of his guests, and I was relieved when Leah bowed out, telling him she was exhausted. We were taking a walk through the City of Light at nighttime, trying to find ourselves somehow in that maze of cobblestone streets, when I said:
“We should celebrate. Have dinner or grab a drink.”
“Okay,” she said, eyes focused on the rooftops.
“Okay? Just like that?” I joked.
She didn’t respond, so we kept going in the direction of the apartment. Not long before arriving, we decided to stop in a bar with vintage wood décor. In the back, past the table where we were sitting, there was a dartboard and a pool table that brought back happy memories of the nights Oliver and I spent in Brisbane in our university era.
We ordered two beers, a plate of pasta, and another of vegetables.
She let her hair down, and it cascaded down her back, almostreaching her waist. I tried not to get lost in her cleavage, but with the dress she’d chosen, it was no easy task. We talked about work and the upcoming weeks while we ate. The last thing I wanted to do when we had finished was return to our shared apartment and watch her close herself up in her room. I couldn’t stand more nights pretending I didn’t want to open the door and show her we deserved a second chance. I wanted answers, words. Silence wasn’t going to solve our problems.
Looking over at the pool table, I asked her how she felt about a game.
“Fine. I won’t know what I’m doing, though.”
We ordered two more beers and walked over to the pool tables. The lights were dim in that section of the bar. I slipped a coin inside after handing her a cue and picking my own.
“How about we do one question for each ball you sink?”
She nodded mistrustfully and rubbed a little chalk on her cue before asking permission to break. I let her have it. She bent over, squinted, and struck the cue ball hard. Nothing went in.
“Tough luck, babe. My turn.” I hit the cue ball and knocked one in. I was hesitant at first, but then I said to hell with that voice whispering to me that it was a bad idea to proceed this way. “Is what you have with him anything like what you had with me?” I asked.
With eyes like saucers, she responded, “Honestly, Axel?”
“You gonna answer?”
“You honestly want to have this conversation standing over a pool table?” She clicked her tongue and shook her head. “You’re out of your damned mind.”
“You want an easier question? Like, uh, are you more of a beach person or a mountain person? Sweet food or savory? Cats or dogs?” I could see I was making her tense, but I didn’t let up.
“Fine, if that’s what you want… It’s not the same. It’s more real.”
I ignored what felt like a blow to the chest.
“More real? So you think what we had was a joke?”