Page 65 of All That We Are Together

“Yeah, sorry.” I managed a smile.

I forced myself to breathe before I plunged into the multitude. To be sincere, I barely understood what was happening for the next thirty minutes. I was overwhelmed and a little dizzy. My brother hugged me proudly, and everyone else did too: the Nguyens, Blair, Kevin, some friends, some old classmates who’d decided to show up. The rooms were full, Justin was in charge of the catering in the reception area, the music was sounding like an unexpected gift. I let myself go. Everything was perfect. Almost everything.

I saw Sam and stopped her.

“Have you seen Axel?” I asked.

“I think he went to his office earlier. I’ll go find him.”

“No, I’ll go.”

“Okay. Wait, Leah.” She placed a hand on my shoulder and smiled. “I wanted to tell you we’ve sold a painting, and there’s interest in the other three. The opening’s a success. And this is only the beginning.”

I was about to ask which one they’d bought, because losing something that had been so mine was strange, but I forgot about it when I remembered Axel while the notes of “Let It Be” floated around me. I advanced down the hall, leaving behind the crowds, and opened the door to his office without knocking.

“Axel?”

My voice faded into the shadows, and a pair of solid arms surrounded me and pulled me into a chest I knew all too well. I felt the warm air of his breath on the nape of my neck, and I felt him shaking against me. And something damp on my skin. Fingers around my waist. Relief. Pain.

I shuddered when I realized he was crying, and I tried to hold in my own tears, but in vain.

I hugged him tighter and wished I could melt into him, see all he was feeling, dig around in his heart. I didn’t know what that meant. I didn’t want to think about it either. For a few minutes of silence and darkness, we were just two people who, despite everything, still loved each other, and shared too much.

“I promised him…” His voice cracked as it overtook the room.

I closed my eyes when I realized what he meant.

The promise he’d made my father when he realized that he’d never exhibit anything himself, and he assured him he’d get me to do it instead.

I held him tight, pressed my head into him.

“Thanks for everything, Axel. For the music.”

“Thanks for letting me back into your life.”

54

Axel

A part of me was still afraid, and just wanted to stay there in that office forever with Leah in my arms. But the other part was trying to find its way forward slowly and knew that I needed to learn to face reality. Like the reality that our hug was ephemeral. Or that just a few feet away were tons of people who wanted to share that night with her.

So I relaxed and pulled away from Leah.

“We need to go back out.”

“I know,” she said.

“You go ahead. I’ll follow.”

She realized I needed a minute to myself and left noiselessly, almost on tiptoe. I took a deep breath when the door closed. It was done. I had kept my promise to Douglas. And being true to my word was heartening in a way I’d never known before.

Satisfied, I walked down the hall to the biggest exhibition room and greeted some acquaintances before a woman interested in one of the pieces rushed me. From that moment on, help out as Sam might, I didn’t have a minute free all night. Now and again, Icaught a glimpse of my family enjoying themselves. And of course, Leah lit up every room she walked through.

When the evening reached an end and the gallery was emptying out, Leah came over. She was holding hands with him. I forced myself to breathe, but my lungs were on fire, I felt… Really, I couldn’t put a name to it, because I’d never felt that way. And if I thought I was ready for that moment, I was wrong.

She spoke faintly.

“Landon, this is Axel,” she managed to say.