Page 53 of All That We Are Together

Looking at him…

Shaking…

I turned around and went back to the living room.

I stood there a while until I calmed down and remembered why I’d come to see him. I went to the kitchen and opened the cabinets to see what was inside them. Too much alcohol, to start with. Not much food. I smiled when I saw the envelopes of powdered soup Georgia must still buy him regularly. I grabbed one and turned on the light to read the instructions, because I couldn’t remember how much water they needed. As the light bled into the living room, I could make out above his desk the painting I’d given him weeks back in the studio, the one that showed our stretch of sea.

I took out a pot and boiled water in it. I’d make him dinner, wake him up, and make sure he was okay before I left.

Nothing else.

45

Axel

I didn’t know what time it was when I woke up.

The pain had died down, but my head was still throbbing. I got up slowly, trying not to make any sudden movements, and walked barefoot to the living room. I stopped when I noticed the scent pervading the house and I saw her there, sitting on a stool in the kitchen looking at me.

“Am I still dreaming? Because if so, I don’t know what you’re doing still dressed.”

Leah rolled her eyes and smiled.

“I wanted to see how you were,” she said.

I sat on the free stool next to the wooden counter across from her and tried to figure out what she was doing there. Happy as I was to see her, I was also surprised.

She got up and poured the soup into a bowl and set it down in front of me before handing me a spoon. I struggled to grasp what exactly was going on.

“I feel better now. You don’t need to do this.”

“It’s just dinner,” she replied.

I’d been sick to my stomach all afternoon. I was no longer nauseated, but when my migraines struck, I preferred to pick up a bottle or stay confined to the bed. Hot soup was a no-go.

“Your family’s right, Axel. You’re unbearable. When someone comes to your house to take care of you, the best thing is to just saythanksand put whatever they’ve made you in your mouth. It’s called manners.”

“You know I don’t have those.”

“True. I’ve got to go, so…”

“No, wait. Have dinner with me. Take half.”

I pointed at the bowl with my spoon and gave her a pleading look. If my idiot face didn’t melt her resistance, nothing would. I was starting to feel ashamed of myself.

After a moment’s hesitation, Leah sat down.

We divided the soup into two bowls and sank into a silence that said all too much. Or maybe that’s just what I thought. Maybe it was easier for me to believe that something was left ofusthan to accept the reality, the pain.

I got up to gather the dishes.

“I should go,” Leah said.

“You can’t walk back alone at night.”

“Don’t be stupid,” she said.

“I’ll take you. Just wait a while so I can smoke.” I grabbed my pack of cigarettes. Her look was doubting, but she followed me onto the porch. “If they didn’t know you, a person would say I had just kidnapped you or something. You don’t need to glare at me.”