Page 16 of The Defenseman

"Is there anything else you want to know before you carry on?" Eric asked her, trying to search her eyes for the truth. She had a knack for putting on a brave face, but Eric wanted to be able to read between those lines and see Alexa for who she really was.

"No, I don't think so," she admitted.

"Hey." Eric tilted her chin up with the crook of his index finger so she was forced to look him in the eyes. There, he could see everything: her desire, her fear. "If you don't want to do this, we don't have to do this. This is for you, not for me."

"I want to," she said.

"Alexa," Eric said. "I swear, you won't hurt my feelings if you decide to change your mind. Don't be afraid to tell me how you feel. That's the real lesson, you know? Honesty—with yourself and with me. And whoever your partner will be."

Eric nearly choked on the last sentence. He didn't like thinking of her with anyone but him. He cleared his throat and pushed on.

"Trust me, I want this," he said. "I want you. And not just to teach you things, but for my own selfish desires. But I want you to want it too. It's not just about me."

“I want to,” she repeated.

Eric felt a swell of emotion unknot the web that made up his heart. He wasn’t quite sure why this was such a big deal to him, why winning over her trust meant a lot to him. It certainly wasn’t because he was going to get some—though that was definitely exciting unto itself. If anything, he was pleased that Alexa—once shy to the point where she would blush at the mere mention of sex or anything like it—was now propositioning him for it.

It wasn’t just that she wanted to have sex, it was that she wanted to have sex with him.

There was a huge difference.

Eric nodded. He wasn’t going to continue to try and talk her out of it. He needed to respect her mind and her desires. He had been teaching her about figuring out what she wanted, and now that she knew, he needed to respect that.

He leaned forward and kissed her head—a lingering kiss that was sweeter than expected.

He began to undress himself. He caught sight of the flush on her face that scattered down her neck and across her chest. She shifted but her eyes lingered on his body, and he felt his lips curl up at the sight of it. She was more curious than she was shy.

By the time he was completely naked, Alexa had turned red. However, her eyes were on his body, tracing the hard edges that made up his person. She didn’t seem to be as reserved as he'd expected her to be. If anything, there was awe in those blue irises, as though she had never seen anything like him before.

From that point, he went through the motions. He slid on a condom, he positioned himself at her entrance, and he began to trail butterfly kisses up and down her face, her neck, across her shoulders, in order to ensure entering her wouldn’t be as painful as it could have been. She sank her nails into his back as he pushed through, but he didn’t force himself to go any further until she was used to his girth. From there, he moved back and forth, testing the waters, until the nails receded and she was still tense but not in pain.

He slid his hand between their bodies and found her nub. He began to move it back and forth just as he rocked himself back and forth.

It wasn’t long before Alexa was gripping his shoulders, hooking her ankles behind his waist, panting in his ear.

He should have been prepared for this, but he wasn’t. His orgasm took him by surprise.

Thank God she was on the brink of her own and they could shatter together. Eric had lost himself in the moment, and if Alexa hadn’t released herself at that very moment, he would have been embarrassed.

When they finished, he tucked her under his chin, holding on to her. For some inexplicable reason, he wasn’t quite ready to let go of her just yet.

But he wouldn’t think about that now.

“Can I ask you a favor?” she asked in a low voice.

“Hmm?” He didn’t even open his eyes.

“Can we go back to your place?” she asked. “I’m supposed to meet with my brother tomorrow but I would rather spend time with you. I’ll shoot him a text to cancel but he might show up and I’d rather not deal with him.”

Eric popped one eye open. “Sure,” he said. “Anything for you.”

He was surprised that he actually meant it.