Page 54 of It Destroys Me
I walked into the study and found him standing in front of the hearth, arms crossed over his chest, wearing sweatpants and a t-shirt like he’d left the house just to come here.
He stared at me, his blue eyes trying to gauge my mood.
I moved to the sitting area and stood in front of the couch but didn’t sit down. The coffee table was between us.
Axel was the one who’d decided to come, but he didn’t appear to have anything to say.
I didn’t know where to start.
“I’m sorry for what I said.” His voice was quiet and somber. His typical grin and smartass attitude had been left in the car. “Really.”
“I know.”
A slow grin moved over his lips. “This is going a lot better than I expected it to.”
“I know you meant well. You always mean well.” He shouldn’t have said a lot of the shit that came out of his mouth, but I also shouldn’t have reacted so harshly. “I only have one button, and you pushed it.”
The smile disappeared. “I’ll never press that button again, Theo.”
“I appreciate that.”
He looked down at the coffee table between us for a while. “I know it’s not my place to say this, but…have you ever considered talking to someone?”
All I did was stare.
“It might help…is all I’m saying.”
“I can talk to someone for the rest of my life and it’s not going to help, Axel.”
He gave a nod. “Fair enough.” He looked at me again. “But maybe you should talk to Astrid about it.”
“She knows what happened to Shayla.”
“But maybe tell her how much it’s affecting your relationship with her.”
This was one of those moments where I wanted to lash out, but I kept the bullet in the chamber. “I know you mean well, Axel. But let me handle my relationship.”
Axel stared at the big red button but didn’t press it. “She’s welcome to stay with us while you’re gone. Just let me know when, and I’ll be ready.”
Now I felt guilty for snapping at him when he was the only guy in the world I could trust. I would never leave Astrid with anyone else. “I appreciate that.”
His eyes flicked to the door and stayed there.
I turned my head to see that Astrid had walked inside, wearing one of my t-shirts and my sweatpants, the clothing ridiculously big on her petite frame. But she looked so fucking cute in my clothes, so unquestionably mine.
“I’m sorry,” she said quickly. “I didn’t know where you’d gone?—”
“You’re fine, sweetheart.” She clearly still remembered the way I’d screamed at her for helping herself to my bedroom, because she was always afraid of crossing a line she couldn’t see. “You’re staying with Axel tomorrow night.”
She glanced at him before she looked at me again. But she didn’t ask any questions, like she already knew why. “I’m glad you two made up.”
“We’ll always make up,” Axel said, giving me his signature smirk.
She came closer to me, her face free of makeup, her eyes still tired from the nap she’d just taken. “How long will you be gone?”
My arm circled her waist, feeling the curtain of clothing that surrounded her little frame. “A day…if it all goes well.” Her things were still in her bedroom, but she slept with me every night so she pretty much had moved in. If I killed Bolton, I wouldn’t ask her to leave. She could stay as long as she wanted to…or never leave.
“I’ve been dreading this.”