Page 20 of It Destroys Me
“I have a strong suspicion that paperwork would never see the light of day. Bolton is connected to everyone.”
“And you think Theo isn’t?”
I gave a shrug. “I think filing for divorce is a waste of time anyway, because the marriage will end in death.”
Her eyes narrowed slightly.
“Theo will either kill him or…he’ll kill Theo, and then I’ll be his slave again until I die.” It was a depressing thought to have over dinner, but it was my reality. “I’m kinda living in a fairy tale with Theo right now, so it’s easy to forget my reality. But that is my reality.”
She didn’t fill the tension with a bunch of meaningless phrases, like it’ll get better and don’t worry about it…whatever most people said to make someone else feel better. She chose to let the silence linger like she knew my concerns were valid. “Theo is a cut above the rest. Maybe your husband is a hit man, but my money is still on Theo—and not because I’ve got a dog in the fight.”
“I know Theo is physically superior, but Bolton is smart. Really smart.” Most people didn’t understand just how smart he really was. I’d found his old school things when I was cleaning out the attic, and his test scores were always in the highest percentile. His IQ had him in the gifted category.
“He cheated on you,” she snapped. “How smart can that idiot be?”
I smirked.
She smirked back. “What kind of man is married to a hot piece of ass like you and asks for an open marriage? Maybe he’s brilliant on paper, but in the real world, he’s a fucking dumbass. I have no doubt that Theo will handle it.”
“I’m grateful that Theo wants to handle it.” I wasn’t his problem, but he made me the most important problem in his life. He’d become my shield, my bulletproof vest. He said he was only willing to try, but he’d already offered so much more.
“He cares for you.”
“Yeah.” But not as much as I cared for him, judging by the way my heart screamed anytime he walked into the room.
She drank her wine as she looked at me. “Why do I feel like there’s more to that statement?”
“Is this why you asked me to dinner?” I teased. “To spill the tea?”
“No. I could just get it from Theo if that’s what I wanted.”
“I didn’t know you guys were close like that.” I knew Axel was his brother and he cared for Scarlett like a sister, but I didn’t know they had these one-on-one conversations on a much deeper level.
“I know how to drag things out of him. He’s not an open book like Axel.”
Sometimes I wished he were an open book. Sometimes I wished I knew what he felt when he felt it. It seemed like I discovered stuff after the fact, when he couldn’t keep it in any longer. “Can I tell you something in confidence?”
“Of course.”
“I don’t want Theo to know about it.”
“I promise I won’t tell him.”
“Or Axel,” I said.
“He’s the last person I would tell because he’d run straight to Theo like a schoolgirl.” She grabbed another piece of bread and slathered it with butter. “Come on, girl. I’ll protect your secrets like a priest in a confessional.”
It had been a whirlwind since the moment I’d met him. Since the moment I’d first had him. It’d been up and down with lots of bumps in between, but now the road was finally smooth and everything I’d repressed had come out in full force. “I’m falling so hard for him.” It felt good to get it off my chest, to say it to someone since I couldn’t say it to him. “He said he was willing to try to have something with me, and I’m over here head over fucking heels.”
“You don’t want him to know?”
“He’s smart,” I said. “I’m sure he senses it.”
“But you’re afraid to tell him.”
“I’m afraid to tell him and scare him off.”
“Well…” She took a bite of her bread and swallowed it down before she continued. “In case you haven’t noticed, he’s dealing with your crazy ex and still hasn’t given up, so I don’t think you can scare him off.”