Page 72 of Living La Vida Mocha
Meanwhile, nurses walked around; iPads full of information they wouldn’t share with me. Doctors paraded by in their runners scuffing the floor with a terrible squeak, ignoring me as if seeing someone perched on the edge of darkness wrapped in heartbreaking sobs was nothing new. I was so desperately alone. And terrified.
But that was then, this was now. Although everything had changed, it still felt the same.
Onto shaking legs, I pushed to a stand and stared. I needed to escape.
My breath laboured unbelievably hard causing spots to appear on the edges of my vision. Sweat built across my forehead and using the back of my hand, I wiped it away, smearing the dampness on my jacket.
Heartbeats pushed me past the chairs, ignoring the silent TV, all the while fighting to breathe and to focus as I inched toward the empty nurses’ station. Gripping the counter until my knuckles turned white, I attempted to read the board full of swimming letters and swirling words.
“Help me.” My childlike voice called out softer than the thundering rush of my violently beating heart.
No one came. Not a nurse. Not a doctor. Not even an orderly.
My vision darkened. Memories flooded across in a sick mix of slow motion and high speed.
Four letters in bright red gave me a sign. E – X – I – T.
And just like that, I put one foot in front of the other, moving through the corridor until the outside air pulled me in. I inhaled shallow breaths as the tunnel vision narrowed to a pinpoint of light.
My words garbled, my heart stopped, and my world went black.
Chapter Nineteen
I was hot; such a contrast to the biting cold. It was a comforting type of heat though, and I snuggled into it. However, something wasn’t right.
Slowly, I peeled my eyelids apart and blinked in the muted light, trying to remember where I was. A heart rate monitor picked up its audible pulse. I pulled my arm back and a soft grunt filled the air.
“Hey, Sleeping Beauty.” It was Carter’s gruff voice.
I was lying beside him, my arm draped across his chest in some kind of death hold. As I moved, a rushing sensation flowed to my fingertips, replaced by a pins and needles feeling a few seconds later.
“We were wondering when you were going to wake up.” Bea’s unmistakable voice came from behind me.
“We’re in the hospital?” After a hard blink, I stared at my shirt. Long gone was the sweater I wore to dinner, replaced by a matching blue snowflake pattern gown Carter was also wearing.
What happened? Why was I a patient too?
Beeps from a heart rate machine and low voices wrapped around the salmon-coloured curtain, beyond which, a patient snored. We were still in the ER.
“Why am I in bed with you?”
From under my cheek on his chest, I felt the rumble of his gentle laugh. “Because Jasper was right.”
“I’m so confused.” Trying to get my bearings straight, I blinked again and shook my head.
“You’re confused?” Carter chuckled. “Tell me about it. I woke up here when the last thing I remember is talking with you on the park bench about rejection, but it couldn’t have been me doing the rejection.”
“It wasn’t.” I went to move but a variety of leads coming offmychest froze me into place. I peeked under my gown. Four were attached to my chest and one to my finger.
Bea, who I didn’t even know was there, cleared her throat and stood behind me. “I have your sweater and bra in a bag.”
“What’s going on?”
“What do you remember?” Long gone was her intense tone, instead replaced with a soft and comforting voice. One I’d like to keep hearing.
“Not much.” Suddenly uncomfortable, I sat up on the edge of the bed. “I, we, followed you to the hospital. You went in, you followed.” I pointed to Bea. “Jasper and I went to the waiting room and then he went for coffee.” I tipped my head from side to side to try and remove a painful kink. “After that, my memory is fuzzy. I remember being cold, and then somehow, I was comforted. After that, there was a rush of noise and too many voices but I don’t remember the details.” I glanced at Bea who clearly had all the answers. “What happened?”
“Jasper went to get coffees like you said, and when he came back you had collapsed outside against the ambulance bay.” She hung her head. “He saw you drop.”