Page 67 of Mistaken as His Royal Bride
‘Go on.’
Ari was grim. Not exactly encouraging, but Maddi couldn’t go back now.
She shrugged minutely. ‘In a nutshell, because you’re right. I was hiding in the shadows. I could have come to find Laia after our father died, to claim my birthright, but I didn’t. I told myself I wasn’t interested in becoming a princess or living in that world. But the truth is that I was terrified of risking rejection. So I waited until she came to me. When my father sent my mother into exile it was before I was even born. He rejected me before he even knew me. That...that put a mark on me for my whole life. And I never realised how deep it went until you made me see it.’
She ploughed on.
‘And then, when I came here...met you... I told myself that I couldn’t betray Laia’s confidence. She wanted to reveal my identity when the time was right for her. I couldn’t risk you using the information to wreak some kind of revenge...or that’s what I told myself. But really I was still tied to the fear of rejection. I fantasised about telling you who I was...but I was terrified you’d still reject me. So it was fear—again.’
Ari said nothing. Maddi couldn’t read his expression. She was too scared to.
‘I came here tonight to tell you how I feel because if there’s any chance that you might feel the same way then I would like to have a life with you, Ari. Loving you and getting to know every part of you. For ever. But if you don’t then at least you’ll know how I feel. I know having a life with you would also mean my becoming Queen, and I’m barely used to being a princess...but I would try my best to do you proud. Because I love you. So much.’
Maddi stood there for a long moment. Emotionally naked and exposed.
Ari was looking at her with wide eyes. She didn’t know if it was a look of shock, or disgust, or—
She realised as the silence wore on that she didn’t want to know. Clearly he didn’t know how to respond because he didn’t feel an atom of what she felt.
Devastation quietly settled in her gut, cold and frigid. She took a step back. Still he didn’t do anything or say anything.
‘Okay, look... Please don’t use this as an opportunity to mock me, Ari. Just let me leave with a little dignity. You won’t ever see me again. I promise.’
Somehow Maddi was able to make her legs move and she took one step in front of another and went towards the door.
Just as she put her hand on the knob she felt movement behind her, and the door was kept shut by Ari’s hands on it, over her head. He was caging her in.
He said, ‘You are going nowhere. You are never leaving this palace again.’
Maddi placed her forehead against the door. ‘Ari, I’m sorry for what happened, okay? And the fact that the marriage didn’t happen—’
Ari put his hands on Maddi’s shoulders and spun her around so fast her head was spinning again.
‘Ari...?’ She looked up at him, and the expression on his face dissolved any words she might have said.
It was crazed. His eyes were burning.
‘I am so over that marriage not happening,’ he said. ‘I’m not letting you leave here because if you do I won’t be able to live. I’ve only been half living since you left.’
‘Since you let me leave,’ she said shakily.
He shook his head. ‘I was so angry. You came into my life like a whirlwind and upended everything I knew. My nice, neat, complacent life. You stirred up every emotion I’ve ever had and hidden, and some new ones that I don’t think have even been invented yet.’
Maddi hardly dared to breathe. ‘Is that a good thing?’
Ari barked out a laugh. ‘I think it’s only a good thing if you’re here to help me regulate them.’
‘You want me to stay?’
‘Yes, please.’
‘Like...as your...guest...? Before you marry someone suitable?’
Ari glared at her. ‘Don’t you get it yet? It’s you, Maddi. Only you. There will be no one else. I’m so fathoms deep in love with you that I’m drowning, and you’re the only one who can save me.’
Maddi’s heart cracked open. ‘Why did you let me go? Why didn’t you come for me?’
‘Because I’m an idiot and a coward and I was hurt that you hadn’t trusted me.’