Page 35 of Finding Answers For Confused Succubi
"What's changing your mind?"she asks curiously.
"Nothing, really.The reason I keep saying it is because I don't want to have to deal with all the complicatedness that being ace and dating brings.When am I supposed to explain to someone that it's not them, it's me?And that I'll have sex, but they're the ones that will have to initiate it?Every time.It feels like it's one of those situations where it's just going to end up with people getting hurt.So it's better to avoid it completely."
"But I'm different," Mandy says.
"Yeah.you're different.And that's not to say that there aren't going to be people out there who would be okay with the situation, I'm sure there are plenty of them out there.But I guess it's still easier with someone who understands on every level."
"Then I look forward to our next meal together being a proper date," Mandy responds."So long as that's what you want."
I look at her, my heart squeezing as I take her in."It's what I want."
She leans in and kisses my cheek.
Warmth floods through me in response."Okay, I'm going to go and make you some food.And then you should rest."I get to my feet and head out of the door, feeling as if something has been settled that I never knew needed to be addressed.
But I like it.More than I expected to.
Fourteen
Mandy
The knockon my door has me on my feet within seconds.
I pull it open, a rush of what feels like excitement travelling through me at the thought of seeing Darius, even if I'm feeling a little nervous about telling him my decision on thetrying to have sexfront.
It's not even just that I want to fix my magic issue.I guess I'm a little interested in the way he talks about liking it even if he doesn't want it.I don't know if that's going to be the case for me too, but this is probably my best chance of finding out.
"Hey," he says, his face lighting up when he sees me."One of your flatmates let me in."
I nod and wave into my room."Come in."
"Are you okay?"he asks, stepping inside.
"Yes."I pause, realising I don't actually want to lie."Mostly.I feel better than I did yesterday, but not the best I've ever felt"
He closes the door behind him."I ordered pizza, it should be here in about half an hour."
"Thanks."I shuffle awkwardly."I'd like to try," I blurt out.
He turns to look at me.
"Sorry, I just wanted to get that out of the way."
"Ah, you mean sex."
I nod."I still have some reservations about it, but it's a good idea."
"Okay, how can I put your mind at ease?"he asks.
I sit down on my bed, leaving enough room for him to sit beside me."I guess I'm worried that you're planning on doing something you don't want to do."
"I promise, I'm not doing anything I'm not comfortable with."
"But you're only agreeing to this because of my situation," I say.
"Kind of?I'm agreeing to this because I like you, and I want to date you, and I want to help you in any way I can."
"But what if it isn't good for you?"