Page 70 of Orc Savage

“And finally, Amara Wolf, do you promise to share your burdens with your mate and allow him to ease them?”

“I promise to my mate and to the War God.” When I speak, I am looking at Kian.

He slips the bright ring onto my finger, and I burst into tears again.

He pulls me into his arms as I sob against his chest.

Kian kisses my cheeks and then my forehead as the orcs around us cheer raucously.

And finally, our lips meet, and I know that our vows are sealed.

32

KIRSTEN

The loneliness will go away one day. Don’t pay it any heed. Besides, you’re better off alone.

Sometimes I am so lonely that my chest aches from it. Sometimes I am so lonely that I need to find a small, dark space where I can sob so hard that my body rattles.

Sometimes I am so lonely that it is all I can do not to pack my bags and leave. I could head back to the settlement.

Maybe there I will find someone who will take the loneliness away.

But I know that despite my desire to leave, it would be foolish of me right now.

Life is, quite unfortunately, very good in the Risen Ash clan camp.

There is enough food and enough water, and there is enough medicine to go around. Here, I don’t have to worry about dying from infection or being attacked by rabid lions or bears.

Here, things are good. And I fucking hate it.

“Are you okay?” Julie comes up to me and offers me some food, but I am too queasy to eat. I am surrounded by orcs who could attack at any moment, and my nerves are stretched thin.

“I’m fine.” I shake my head, and my eyes drift back to where the woman who just joined the camp, Amara, is sitting on her mate’s lap.

“I think I’m going to turn in early,” I say to Julie and stand up.

“Kirsten.” Julie grabs my hand, and we walk back to the little structure that I have made home. “Listen, you can’t stay this isolated forever. I can promise you this, no orc in this camp will hurt you. I know you’re suspicious of them, but they won’t hurt you.”

I laugh bitterly and wrench my hand away from Julie’s. I feel guilty right away when her eyes widen with hurt.

“You say that now.” I try to speak more calmly. “But they’re orcs!” I spit the words, and I do not care if any ofthemhear me.

Julie doesn’t get upset. I don’t think she’s capable of it. Instead, her face softens, and she pulls me into a hug.

I sag against her body, and when I start crying, I know I won’t be able to stop anytime soon.

“You’re lonely.” Her voice is so gentle that it breaks my heart even more. “And you’ve left the only home you’ve ever known. I think you should just take some time for yourself. I know that may seem antithetical, considering I just said you were lonely. But I think you’re so stressed out that you can’t even be okay on your own.”

Julie hugs me tightly, fiercely, until my body stops shuddering and the tears stop coming.

When I pull away from her, I do not look at her. I do not know if it is from shame or anger. I do not care, either.

Instead, I run back to the little house that the orcs have allowed me to stay in.

I rip off the clothes that Julie made for me for the mating ceremony – she wanted everyone to have a new set of clothing for the apparently auspicious occasion - and sag against the front door, naked except for underwear.

I sit there until the sun goes down and it starts getting cold.