Page 154 of Tame the Heart

For a split second, I’m back at that gas station in Winslow, a cool Coke bottle in my hand and a map spread in front of me. Would I change it if I could? Point my heart in a different direction?

No.

The answer is no.

I wouldn’t change it. Not for the world. Not for my life.

After this summer, I will never go back to living half-asleep. Of experiencing the world through my bedroom window, or on my computer screen.

All these miles, all these years, my heart was leading me to Charlie.

I have to give him the choice to accept it, to forgive me or not. To love me ...or not.

If he doesn’t, I’ll understand. I’ll move on.

It’s my mistake.

I have to own it.

I have to come clean.

Tell Charlie the truth.

Tame my heart.

My phone buzzes, and I sigh when I see Max’s name on the caller ID.

Why does he have to pick this moment to call? Still, I’ve been avoiding his calls ever since I decided to stay in Resurrection. I can’t ignore him anymore.

With trembling hands, I pull the car over to the side of the road, because I don’t trust myself to have this conversation and drive safely.

I put the phone to my ear. “Hi.”

Max exhales in relief. “So, you’re alive.”

“Barely,” I whisper, glancing at the storm clouds again. My heart beats crazily, an echo to my mind.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Nothing.”

Max swears. “You had a flutter.”

I almost drop the phone. “What? No.”

“I can tell, Ruby.”

He’s right. He can. My brother has been a part of my heart as long as I have had it.

“How many? How many flutters, Ruby?” Max’s panicked voice cuts through my muddled mind.

“Too many,” I say flatly.

“Fuck. I’ll come get you.”

I shake my head, over and over. “Don’t. Don’t bother.”

I feel my life slipping between my fingers.