Page 63 of The Inn on Bluebell Lane
“You just needed time,” Gwen murmured, her eyes fluttering closed as if they had weights attached to them. She simply couldn’t keep them open any longer. She felt so dreadfully tired…
“Mum? Mum?” Matthew leaned forward and touched her arm, and then he laid a cool hand across her forehead. “Mum,” he exclaimed, his voice full of alarm, “you’re burning up!”
CHAPTER 33
ELLIE
“She’s picked up an infection,” the consultant explained as Ellie and Matthew sat in a little room off the oncology ward later that evening, having rushed Gwen to the hospital. “Which can happen quite easily at this stage, because the white blood cell count is so low. It should respond well to antibiotics, and she can be home and resuming treatment in a couple of days.”
“I didn’t even realize she was so poorly…” Ellie couldn’t keep the guilt from curdling her stomach as she thought of how grumpy and hassled she’d been, while Gwen was so ill. “She must have picked it up from one of the kids.”
The consultant smiled in understanding as he spread his hands wide. “It happens. You caught it quickly, before it’s become too serious, so well done.”
But she hadn’t caught anything, Ellie acknowledged. Matthew was the one who had noticed, and only when Gwen had practically passed out! Ellie had been feeling annoyed and overwhelmed by her children’s moods, Sarah’s sudden aggression, her husband’s absence, and Gwen’s need. She’d sent Gwen off to the sitting room and basically forgotten her, especially when Matthew had come in and told her he was on board with her idea for Bluebell Inn, which was wonderful, but right now she felt horribly guilty for not seeing just how ill her mother-in-law was.
Matthew put an arm around her shoulders and Ellie leaned into his solid warmth. “It’s going to be all right, Ellie,” he said quietly. “And, in any case, you shouldn’t blame yourself. You’re not Atlas. You don’t have to carry the world on your shoulders, you know.”
Except she sort of did, Ellie thought glumly, because who else was going to do it? She knew Matthew wanted to help, and he would, but… when it came down to it, all her responsibilities still weighed heavily.
Gwen was sleeping peacefully, so they left the hospital, with Ellie promising to come by in the morning. “I hope it hasn’t all kicked off at home,” she remarked wearily as she climbed into the car. They’d left Jess in charge, which usually meant an argument broke out between her and Ben.
“Hopefully not,” Matthew said as Ellie started the car. They drove through the parking lot and out into the rainy autumn night, the world dark and wet all around them. “Autumn in Wales,” he remarked wryly as raindrops spattered the windshield.
“It does make the grass very green,” Ellie replied with an answering smile.
Matthew did a double take. “Does that mean you’re getting used to live in Llandrigg?”
“Getting there,” Ellie replied. Her moods still seemed to swing high and low, but she was starting to feel as if an even keel was at least a possibility. “I’m glad you’re on board with the idea for the B&B.”
“Me too.” His tone was heartfelt. “I’ve already got some plans I hope you’ll like—I was thinking we could put a door between two of the bedrooms and make a family suite, and maybe turn the study into a games room. We could get table football, a bunch of board games—”
“Oh, Matt,” Ellie exclaimed, “that’s just the kind of thing I was thinking of—or wishing I could think of, really. It’s the spirit of it exactly.”
He gave her a quick grin, his eyes sparkling in a way Ellie couldn’t remember them doing in a long time. “I just wish I could get rid of this cast on my arm so I could really get going,” he said with a sigh, and then a smile. “But I know I need to be patient.”
Just as she did. They were both learning, Ellie thought. Learning and growing. And Matthew seemed to feel that way too, for as they headed toward Llandrigg, he reached for her hand and held it in his. Ellie smiled and squeezed his fingers, and they drove the rest of the way in a silence that felt sweet.
Amazingly, the children were all settled when they came into the house—Ava and Josh in bed, and Ben and Jess doing homework at the kitchen table.
“Thank you for managing everything so well, sweetheart,” Ellie said softly as she paused in the doorway of the kitchen. Jess was at the table, books spread in front of her, along with her laptop, her head bent over them. “I don’t know what we would have done without you here to hold down the fort.”
“It’s okay.” Jess ducked her head, and with a flicker of guilt, Ellie remembered their cross words from earlier.
“I’m sorry for losing my temper before dinner,” she said. “I shouldn’t have gotten so angry.”
“It’s fine.” Jess’s gaze was focused on her laptop, and so, with a sigh, Ellie decided to leave it. She’d had her quota of heartfelt moments for the day, it seemed, and she was grateful for them. She could look forward to a few more tomorrow.
She was feeling optimistic as she went to bed, and she held onto that feeling as she got up the next morning. The children seemed in good spirits; Jess in particular was practically buzzing with energy as she bumped a big duffel bag down the stairs.
“Goodness, what is that for?” Ellie exclaimed with a laugh.
“Sophie and I are going to try on different outfits for the autumn concert,” Jess explained as she put the bag by the door. “So, I brought lots of stuff.”
It cheered Ellie to think that her daughter had made a good friend and was even singing in the concert—and that she’d wanted to tell her mother about it. “Sophie,” she repeated thoughtfully. “Should we invite her over for dinner sometime?”
Jess shrugged, glancing away. “I dunno. Maybe.”
Or maybe not quite yet, Ellie thought as she took in her daughter’s slightly guarded expression. But the children were settling here, she realized with a sense of grateful relief. Like with so many other things, she just needed to be patient.