Page 37 of The Inn on Bluebell Lane
“They’ve had a fab time,” Emma assured Ellie as she stepped into the hallway of a smart brick house on Llandrigg’s new estate on the opposite end of the village from Bluebell Inn. “Barely made a peep, to be honest. They’ve set up an entire Lego universe in the playroom. Come through.”
Ellie followed Emma through a modern but comfortably messy kitchen, to a sunroom built out the back with squashy sofas and a truckload of Lego scattered across the floor. Her heart lightened to see Josh lying on his stomach on the floor, Zach next to him, heads bent together. Lego blocks were everywhere.
“You’ve had a good time, Josh?” she asked lightly, and her son grunted in response, too involved in his elaborate creation even to look up.
“They’ve been like that for hours,” Emma said with a laugh. “Like two peas in a pod, they are.”
“Yes, they really are.” It filled Ellie with relief, to see it. She’d been worried about Josh, concerned about how quiet and withdrawn he sometimes seemed. She knew it took him a while to get used to things, but it was hard to know if he was happy or not. But here he was with a true kindred spirit. Now if only Jess could find a friend…
“Fancy a coffee?” Emma asked as she turned back to the kitchen. “We can leave them to it for a bit longer if you’re not in a rush?”
“Oh…” Ellie knew she’d like nothing better than a coffee and a chat with her own kindred spirit, but she was worried about leaving Gwen alone with the others. Although, she acknowledged, Matthew was home as well, even if he seemed to be keeping to himself since he’d broken his arm, too tired or sore to make much of an effort about anything. Maybe an afternoon with his own children would be good for him.
“A quick one would be wonderful,” she said, and Emma smiled and reached for the kettle.
Ellie slid onto a stool at the breakfast bar, a sigh escaping her without her even meaning it to.
Emma turned around, kettle in hand, one eyebrow arched. “Tough day?”
“No, not particularly.” It hadn’t been, not really. At least, not more than most days lately. Jess had slunk to school in a mood; Josh had clung to her. Ben, at least, seemed to be doing okay, and while Ava could be a bit clingy, she was getting better. All in all, progress was being made; this play date was surely the evidence of that.
After Ellie had dropped the kids off that morning, she’d headed back home; Gwen had disappeared upstairs and she realized she’d actually been looking forward to a bit of a chat with her mother-in-law—more progress! She’d ended up tidying the kitchen by herself before going to see what Matthew was up to. He’d been lying in the bedroom, scrolling on his phone, and when she’d tried to engage him in some conversation, he’d been distracted, as monosyllabic as Ben often was, and he’d told her his arm was aching as a way, Ellie suspected, to end the conversation.
She’d tried not to feel hurt, but she wondered why she seemed to be seeing even less of her husband when he wasn’t busy. There he was, simply sitting around the house, and he seemed to have even less time for either her or the children. Ellie was doing her best not to get aggravated about it, but she feared she was failing, or at least starting to fail. They’d only been in Llandrigg for two weeks, and she knew she had to give the settling-in process more time for all of them—but what about her marriage? Did she need to be patient with that, as well?
“Do you want to talk about it?” Emma asked, and Ellie realized she’d been silent, staring into space, for at least a minute. The kettle had already started to boil.
“Oh, I don’t know,” she managed with a little laugh. “Moving—upheaving your whole life—well, it shows all the cracks, doesn’t it? The cracks that were already there.” Surely this wouldn’t be happening with her and Matthew if there hadn’t been something wrong at the start—a thought that was deeply unsettling.
Emma cocked her head, regarding her thoughtfully as she poured the water into the cafetière. “What cracks would those be?”
“Well, relationship ones, I guess.” Ellie tried for another laugh, but this time she didn’t quite manage it. She wasn’t sure she wanted to talk to her new friend about the fault lines in her marriage; it didn’t feel fair to either Emma or Matthew. And yet, she realized, she wanted—needed—to talk to someone about it, and the only other options were Gwen or Sarah. She definitely didn’t know Sarah well enough yet, and as for Gwen… well, that relationship wasn’t there yet, and Ellie wasn’t sure Gwen would want to hear any implied criticism of her son.
“Husband?” Emma guessed shrewdly as she handed Ellie a cup of coffee. “Moving can be hard on a marriage.”
“Can it? I don’t think I realized.” Ellie took a sip of her coffee. “Thanks for this.”
“Well, it puts strain on it, doesn’t it? He’s stressed about a new job, you’re stressed about your children making friends, you making friends…”
“Yes,” Ellie said with feeling, so grateful Emma got it. “Yes. But Matthew—my husband—doesn’t even have a job, at least not like that. We moved here for him to help my mother-in-law renovate the bed and breakfast business.”
“Maybe that’s part of the problem, then?” Emma suggested. “If he’s used to feeling busy, at an office?”
“Maybe…” Ellie replied slowly.
Matthew had been unemployed for six months before they moved, and the same issues had been going on then. Was this not so much related to moving to Wales, as to Matthew losing his job, feeling useless? She recalled how he’d said he’d felt useful, tearing out those sinks, and she knew he’d needed that. But she hadn’t expected him to keep this distance from her. They needed to talk about it, she decided. Properly. Although when they’d get a chance was another matter…
“Anyway, enough about me,” Ellie said, conscious of how much she seemed to complain. “Tell me about what’s going on with you. Have you thought any more about going back into event planning?”
“Well.” Emma grimaced. “I’m not sure how many events are needed, around here. I’d have to go further afield, I think, to find some work.”
“When Bluebell Inn opens again, maybe we could plan something,” Ellie suggested. “Although, based on our progress so far, I don’t know when that will be!”
Emma’s face lit up. “That would be brilliant,” she said, “if you’re serious. I’ve always loved that old place. I hope you’re able to keep its character, even with the renovations.”
“Well…” Ellie thought of Matthew’s plans for marble bathrooms and other high-end luxuries. “I hope so,” she told Emma with a smile. She had a feeling Gwen hoped so, as well. Ellie glanced at the clock above the stove and realized it was later than she’d thought. “I should probably go,” she told Emma reluctantly, for part of her wanted to stay in this cozy kitchen and keep chatting with a friend. “Next time, you’ll have to tell me more about what’s going on with you. I feel like I’m the one having a moan all the time.”
“Moan away,” Emma replied cheerfully. “I don’t mind.”