Page 12 of The Gangster's Girl
He slowly shakes his head, not wanting any lightheartedness right now as if this is the most important moment of his life. “I’m a man who wants what I’m owed. You do understand that things have changed now, India?”
“I know.” I say, readily agreeing to this.
Clay frowns as if in deep thoughts. “I’m going to want everything from you...,” he pauses, “since you lack experience some of it may shock you
“Please, Uncle Clay,” I say with a furiously red face. “Do we have to talk about that?”
“I’m not just referring to the physical stuff,” he hurries to say, “I’ll need more than that.” He curses again. “I’m not the easiest of men, India but you’re going to have to keep up with me.” His gaze flickers to my lips. “Do you think you can do that?”
“You always tell me I can do whatever I set my mind to,” I smile and he smiles back.
“That’s my girl.” He gives me a pat on the back. “Now go to bed. You can take the guestroom you always take.”
Staring at him in shock, I try not to show that it just felt as if I got a bucket of ice water dropped over my head. “B...but I thought I’d be sleeping with you.”
A growl erupts from his chest, exciting me so much I’m about to fly off the handle but then he pushes it down. “India, I would get you pregnant in a heartbeat and I don’t think you want that deep down.”
Worry goes to my head because he’s right about that. Ronnie and Robbie, they would freak out...it would break them knowing I’d gone in their footsteps when they’ve always wanted me to have my first child at the age of forty.
I frantically lick my lips. “There’s p...protection.”
Clay’s eyes narrow. “What do you know about protection?” he snaps and I squirm.
“Nothing...I just thought...”
“Hush,” he says gently, “we’ll talk about this in the morning.”
But I need to talk about this now! Pushing down the aggravation, I rise and mutter, “Fine then. Keep your hands to yourself. We’ll see how long you’ll be able to last before you explode.”
“India,” he growls in warning and I whirl around, boring my eyes into his.
“Why do you keep calling me that? Why can’t you just call me darlin like you used to?”
Silence spreads in the room, causing the electricity between us to reach heights I didn’t think it could reach and I breathlessly wait for his reaction. His eyes lower before he reluctantly purrs, “Darlin...”
The vibration of his voice drums through me until I feel electrified and I pant, about to lose my balance when he bolts out of the chaise and pulls me to him. Groaning dangerously, he slants his mouth over mine. I panic a little, feeling a danger in him I’ve never felt before.
He keeps it so safely tucked inside of him. But it’s there...it lingers beneath his expensive clothes and I don’t know what to do with it. I’m too inexperienced, too naïve and I gasp in surprise. He uses my amazement against me, deepening the kiss until it feels as if I’m levitating.
“Clay...,” I pant, “please...”
“Go to bed.” He drops me abruptly and I stare at him. He lets out a hiss and turns his back to me. “India, go to bed before this gets out of hand.”
I hesitate, wanting him so much I don’t know what to do but then he snaps.
“Suit yourself,” he growls, reaching for me but the seriousness of the situation dawns on me and I back off. He gets a wild look in his eyes. “Darlin, for fucks sake, don’t play with me when I’m like this.” He stabs his fingers through his hair, his frustration palpable and my heart sinks.
Breathing an excuse, I run upstairs. If we give in, I’ll end up like another version of Ronnie. Clay thinks I don’t want that and he’s right. My mind doesn’t want that.
But my body and heart does.
CHAPTER SIX
India
I wake up before Clay, just two hours after sunrise. Yesterday my emotions were in a whirlwind and the pounding of my heart kept me awake almost the whole night. I feel different. Mature and as if I’ve absorbed some secret knowledge just by kissing Clay.
It’s as if his kiss changed me and I don’t feel like a girl anymore, but a woman.