Page 95 of Empire of Lust
He is not helping matters.
“Then, by all fucking means, let’s allow both of them to run around the world unsupervised. Look, I already feel better…” I pin him with an icy stare.
His nostrils flare as he lets out a slow breath. “My point is, Tatum might have gone along with Bianca to make sure she was safe. After what happened, she probably wasn’t thinking clearly. She fell back on an old habit.”
Running away.Yes, that is an old habit of hers. Because she would rather face a cruel and unforgiving world than face me. I hate myself for wanting so much to believe him. I want to cling to that bit of hope that he’s giving me because I’m a pitiful fucking bastard when it comes to this girl. That’s what she’s done to me. She’s made me weak, emotional, and undisciplined. I’m out of control and won’t be able to find my footing again until I find her. How am I supposed to go on if Bianca isn’t my reason for living?
“Tatum is level-headed,” Romero continues in that measured voice he puts on when he’s trying to calm me down.
That makes me laugh again. If there’s one adjective I’d use when describing my daughter, level-headed would not be it. Now I know he’s breaking his back to placate me, blowing smoke up my ass. “If she was, she would have come to me instead of running off in the middle of the night. It’s irresponsible. They’re acting like they’re having an adventure together or some bullshit.”
My skin is hot and flushed. My body’s been in a rage ever since I found the girls gone, not even thirty minutes after sending Bianca off with my daughter to clean up. I shouldn’t have let her out of my sight, but I was trying to think of what was best, what she needed. Once I noticed the way she clung to Tatum, I thought I had it pinned down.
Asshole me, assuming she’d do better with her best friend than she would with the man she witnessed murdering her ex. Thinking it would cause her greater distress if I got in her face when what I wanted most in the world was to hold her. What if there hadn’t been a way to track her location? We spent days searching for Lucas and never found records of that cabin. I never would have found her. Once again, I went against my instincts and let her walk away.
“Let’s be honest. This could have to do with her being pissy over the Moroni fiasco.”
“It wouldn’t surprise me if that had something to do with it,” he admits, his jaw tightening. “But I know she cares about Bianca. There’s a good chance she did it to be a good friend.”
She needs me. What else must I do to show her she means everything to me? I’ve killed for her. That’s still not enough to keep her from disappearing. I’m not enough to keep her from disappearing.
“Try the app again,” I growl, pacing the room and pounding my fist into my palm. Glass crunches beneath my shoes, and Romero lets out a choked sort of warning sound, but I ignore him. Like I give two shits about broken glass.
It’s better for both of us if I pretend I don’t hear the way he sighs as he pulls out his phone. It’s clear he thinks this is useless, and he might be right, but I’d kick myself to death if either of them turned their phone on, and I missed the opportunity to track them.
Last night, it was a stupid mistake to make Tatum aware of the app. It couldn’t have taken long for one of them to connect the dots and assume Tatum’s phone held the same tracking system. By the time I realized they were gone, they had both switched their phones off, leaving themselves untraceable.
“Nothing.” He sighs after a minute. “I’ll keep checking.”
“How many cars do we have out there looking for them?”
“Eight at the moment.”
That’s not enough, obviously. “We need more.”
“Boss, respectfully—”
“Cut the bullshit,” I bark. I’m going crazy. I fucking killed for her, and she left me. I’ve been sitting on my hands—ineffective—because I want to be here waiting once they’re brought home. Is it any wonder I’m ready to burn the fucking world to ash?
“Fine. We’ve been combing the city since last night. These guys haven’t slept, and they’re still searching every inch of the city. If I send more cars out, I’m going to have to pull some back to give them a chance to sleep.”
“You think I give a fuck about whether they’re well rested? They want to sleep; they need to find the girls. End of story.”
“Fair enough. I’ll get on it.”
“And save your fucking opinion next time,” I shout at the back of his head while he goes to his office. “I didn’t fucking ask for it, so I don’t want it.”
“Point taken.” At least he’s smart enough not to slam his door, though it’s odd enough for him to close it at all.
Motherfucker. Whatever happened to the days when it was simple. My kid stepped out of line, and I could ground her. There’s no grounding a twenty-one-year-old, especially not when she’s my stubborn daughter.
At least I know they won’t go far for long on whatever Bianca has saved in a month at her job. At the very least, I have the comfort of knowing she’s supposed to return to work on Monday. That’s two days from now, and the thought of waiting so long when hardly twenty-four hours has practically broken me…
No way I’m waiting that long. Anything could happen in two days.
I’m still pacing when Romero returns. “It’s done. We’re covering every corner of the city and surrounding suburbs. Something’s bound to come up.”
“I don’t need you coaching me through this.”