Page 91 of #Lovestrong

Lena

Jackson opens the door to a large hospital suite and we're greeted by dim lighting and hushed whispers. As we step around the corner, I look everywhere but the bed. I'm preparing myself for whatever shape Declan is in, but I'm not ready yet. His mom and dad stand on the other side of the room, talking with a tall man in a white jacket.

Jackson moves behind me and squeezes my shoulders gently as he passes me.

I take a deep breath and turn toward the bed.

Declan's leg is wrapped in gauze and bandages from his foot to his thigh, suspended by a sling a few inches off the bed. A sheet covers his other leg and waist up to right above his belly button. There's more gauze and bandages wrapped around his left side and right shoulder.

Tears burn my eyes as I take in all the wires, tubes, and the breathing machine he's hooked up to. His head is wrapped as well, and the only thing that penetrates the buzzing in my ears is the slow beep of his heart monitor.

Walking over, I sit in the empty chair next to him. With shaking hands, I reach out to cover his bruised one with mine. He's black and blue from head to toe. I stare at his face, silently praying for his recovery.

I remember Dad saying it took me almost six hours to wake up from my surgery when they fixed my shoulder. Hopefully, Declan wakes up sooner. I know he needs rest, but I just need to tell him I love him, and then he can sleep for as long as he likes.

"Let's step out in the hall a moment, kids," Declan's father says, placing his hand on my shoulder.

I stand and lean over the bed to kiss Declan's bandaged forehead before turning to follow everyone out. They take Jackson, Candice, Darcy, and I down the hall to the private waiting room. After we're all seated, Mr. Harp lets out a deep breath.

"Declan's in bad shape, guys. He's broken most of his ribs, punctured his left lung, broken two bones in his leg and his collarbone, dislocated his shoulder, and fractured part of his skull. The doctors fixed almost everything, but he's going to have a long recovery ahead of him."

"He's going to live and that's all that matters," Jackson says with a fierce protectiveness in his voice. Candice sits taller and nods her head in agreement.

"You said almost everything," I say quietly, sitting back in my chair. "What couldn't they fix?"

"His brain is swollen," his mother says softly but sternly, looking directly at me. "The doctors won't know if there's any lasting damage until the swelling goes down. So, for now, they're going to keep him asleep so he has time to heal without being stressed."

"Wait, you mean in a coma?" Darcy says, slightly panicked.

"Lasting damage?" Candice lets go of Jackson's hand and scoots forward. "Like brain damage?"

Mr. Harp nods his head as Jackson, Darcy, and Candice all start talking at once, questioning everything from his quality of life to his dreams of college and football. The chatter seems to go on forever, nothing more than an annoying buzz in my ears, but I can't stop staring at his mother. She never breaks eye contact with me, but her eyebrows rise slightly and she nods, just once, so subtle it's almost unperceivable.

"Shut up," I say loudly, and everyone goes quiet. I keep my eyes on Declan's mother. "It doesn't matter. None of the shit you're talking about matters. God didn't take Declan away when he could’ve. He's still here. So it doesn't matter if he's got brain damage, or if he can't play football or can't walk or whatever. The only thing that matters is he's here, he's alive, and we have time with him. Time we almost lost tonight."

I stand and walk out of the room, holding back tears until I'm in his room, back in my chair with my hands gently holding his. This room is so quiet, a mouse fart would be disruptive. Declan's heart monitor beeps steadily, and his breathing tube lets out a light puff each time it takes a breath for him. He's also hooked up to a catheter, pulse-ox machine, blood pressure cuff, and a few other things I don't know the names of.

"You're gonna be okay, baby. Even though you're sleeping, I know you can hear us, Declan. I love you. I'm going to be here, every day, until you wake up. And no matter what, I'm going to be with you, no matter what has to happen after you wake up. I'm not going anywhere ever again, Declan. I promise."

The tears fall down my cheeks again, and I let them fall as I stare at his face and gently rub my fingertips across his bruised skin.

"I think he knew you'd come back." Darcy walks into view from behind me and goes to stand on the other side of the bed. "Ten minutes after he left, I knew something was wrong. I got this feeling, like being flipped upside down suddenly. Hit me so hard, I almost fell off the couch and swore I was going to puke."

Darcy reaches out and touches the side of Declan's face. It's strange listening to her say anything without the hint of venom I'm used to from her. "It stopped after a moment, but I knew. I started texting him, and when he didn't answer, I tried calling. His phone probably has forty missed calls from me."

She chuckles softly as she sits on the open space next to his leg. "When Mom and Dad came in, I told them something was wrong. Mom says it's a twin thing, that in times of extreme emergency or emotion, Declan and I are more connected. I don't know if that's true, but we found him about three minutes after the ambulance got on scene."

I take a deep breath and go back to staring at his face. All this because he was on his way to my house. It seems so unfair, but even when I want to scream, Cameron's words from my dream echo in my head. God has big plans for me and Declan.

That's why we're both alive, even when the odds say we shouldn't be. It's why Declan is the one who found me, huddled in that alley on Fourth of July. This is destiny— the meeting of two people at exactly the right moment in time to bring them together for the bigger purpose God has planned for them.

A cold hand covers mine and I look up to find Darcy leaning over her brother, her eyes swimming with unshed tears. "He loves you, Lena. More than anything. There's nothing Declan wouldn't do or become to keep you and make you happy."

I bite my lip and nod. "I know."

"I'm sorry for everything, Lena. I hope you know that." She lets go of my hand and stands. "I'll let my parents know you're refusing to leave." She winks at me with a ghost of a smile on her face. "They’ll probably add your name to his charts so the hospital doesn't give you any shit."

I laugh softly under my breath. "Thanks, Darcy."

"Any time."

I sigh again, for the millionth time tonight, and lay my head on the side of his bed, facing him, my hands still covering his. I'm exhausted, but I'm not leaving until he wakes up. He's my purpose, and I left him once and this happened. I'll never leave again.