Page 20 of Into the Light

“What did I do?” I rubbed my face, wishing this away.

“What do you think you did?”

; “Please tell me I didn’t?” Because I would seriously rather poke myself in the eye with a shitty stick than nail this bird.

“And why would you want me to tell you that you didn’t?”

“Because...because...” I couldn’t say her name. It was too raw. I told her I was done but was I really done or was this some mini break? I didn’t know the right answer but I knew enough that I didn’t want to jeopardize anything in the future because I was drunk and fucked up, and I mean big fucking time.

“Just tell me, okay?”

“No, you didn’t,” Kate said. “I stopped it.”

“You stopped it?” I asked, shocked and confused by her comment.

“Yes. I knew you would regret this, so drastic times called for drastic measures.”

“What did you do?” The worry crept in but I was also relieved that nothing happened. It was my fucking lucky day all right, whatever it was that saved me.

“I called Eric.”

“YOU DID WHAT?!”

“I called Eric. He met me and we got access to your suite. Victoria was all over you and, well, she told us to piss off but we said no. If it meant we had to sit here and watch then so be it.”

“And then?”

“She said fine and to watch, I s’pose trying to call our bluff, so we did. You even said to me I was free to join in if I wanted but Eric wasn’t allowed.”

“I’m so sorry, Kate.”

“Apology accepted. Well she got the shits and realized we weren’t going anywhere so she yelled at us then finally got her stuff and left.”

“And the condom with the...” Slightly uncomfortable, I didn’t want to say the word in front of her but I think all sense of professionalism flew out the door kicking and screaming last night. “The…um, you know what’s inside?”

“Oh that’s just coconut juice. Eric thought you needed a lesson. Go ahead smell it.”

“I’ll take your word for it.”

As I sat there, I let out a big sigh that Kate saved the day once again. I couldn’t help but feel self-conscious of the fact that I was shirtless as she sat there across from me. She must have sensed it as well as she threw me my Yankees T-shirt which I gladly put on.

“Kate, I could have fucked up big time,” I spoke barely above a whisper.

“Yes, you could have. I knew you would regret this and Charlie would never in this lifetime forgive you for it despite the fact that you aren’t together.”

“But who’s to say she didn’t fuck Julian in the past week or even last night?” The words leaving my mouth were enough to allow the rage inside me to boil over once again.

“Because she wouldn’t. Both of you need to learn the meaning of trust because without it, how can you give yourself completely to another person?”

“There’s nothing left to give. I’m heading back to London tonight and staying put. Any New York work can be handled by you or even Peters. Yeah, send him over to handle the press of the new office.”

“Is this how you are going to leave it?”

“There’s no other option, she made that clear.”

“There always is, you just don’t want to open your eyes.” Maybe that was the case but I was sick of being in this love triangle. All I ever wanted was her, alone. No one else.