Page 104 of All That We Are Together
Leah passed me my crepe, and I absentmindedly tore off the tinfoil, absorbed in my surroundings and thinking to myself that this spring night couldn’t be more perfect. She bit into hers with satisfaction. She’d always been like that, I realized. She’d never needed much to be happy, and I hated all those bumps in the road we’d needed to cross through to reach that simple joy.
“What are you thinking about?” she asked me.
“You. How I think you deserve better.”
“You don’t think I have enough? I’m doing what I love most in the world, and right now I’m having dinner in Paris, and you’re here beside me. What else could I ask for?”
“Are you happy, Leah?”
“Yes. Why wouldn’t I be?”
Her lips pursed slightly, and in her eyes I noted a certain reluctance. I tried not to see it, but it was frozen in my memory. I sighed and bit into my crepe, grabbed the beer bottle, and raised it in front of her.
“A toast?”
“To this evening.”
I took the last sip in it and grabbed the dessert out of her lap. She laughed, still chewing her last bite, and tried to take it back.
“What are you doing, you savage?” I asked.
“Don’t you dare stuff the whole thing in your mouth!”
“Who do you think I am? We’re on a date. Let me remind you that my intention is to win you over so you’ll let me get to third base. Or is it home plate? I don’t remember. Sex, that’s what I’m getting at.”
Her cheeks flushed.
“That’s not going to happen.”
“Are you kidding?”
“Nope. It’s a first date. That was your idea, not mine.”
“I guess I didn’t think through the consequences.”
I tried to slide a hand between her legs, and she shoved me so hard, I couldn’t react when she grabbed the dessert. I laughed as I watched her bite into it and cover her face in Nutella.
“Is kissing also prohibited?”
“Depends on the situation.”
I couldn’t help but grin. There we were sitting on the steps, her arm rubbing against mine, unable to take our eyes off each other. It had been an eternity since we’d just enjoyed each other like that, without remembering the mistakes we’d made or worrying about what would happen tomorrow. We were just there, together, in the moment.
“This honestly looks like the perfect opportunity. You’re covered in chocolate. You could let me lick your face clean. Or better, you could do it yourself, and then I could kiss you and see what it tastes like.”
“I’m guessing you haven’t been on many dates, Axel. Am I right?”
“You know I haven’t. Gimme that!” I took away the crepe.
We shared it in silence looking down over the shifting planes of the roofs beneath the moon. The city glowed with the lights in people’s homes, in their lives, around the monuments. In the distance, Notre Dame was visible, and the Hôtel des Invalides. What I liked most about the city, what I’d discovered in all those walks over the past weeks, was the way every turn led you to something more, something new. And yet… It wasn’t Byron Bay. It never would be.
I wondered if Leah missed it too.
93
Leah
Hardly a star was visible in the sky. I was happy, but still, I thought back to our home, how different it was from all that. Here time had its own rhythm, as if there were just so much more to do. In some dark corner of myself, all that weighed on me: the expectations, the rush, the pressure. And I still hadn’t worked through it all; I was scared to, because everything seemed to tell me that being there, painting, going to events, was the next logical step for me to take. And I didn’t want to bring it up to Axel, not after all he was doing for me.