Page 115 of Obsidian Throne

Everything I couldn’t quite bring myself to ask.

Did he regret leaving me there?

Did he understand how very wrong it was?

Or did he justify it, the same way he did everything else, as a means to an end?

The truth was, I already knew the answer. He wasn’t a monster. I saw remorse stirring behind his eyes, even as he kept the rest of his features under control. It had probably killed him to leave me, the way that it had killed him to Unclan Vasily.

But that didn’t mean he wouldn’t do it again, if and when he deemed it necessary.

Some part of me couldn’t quite handle hearing him admit that right now, knowing that it would feel like hammering the final nail into the coffin of everything we were supposed to be.

And I couldn’t help but be furious with him for that.

So I said nothing.

* * *

The former Unclanned and their families had all been brought into the keep.

Surprising me again, Evander actually hung back, giving me space to talk to my men. I went around to check on a few, visiting with the women and hugging the children, before I finally found Andrei.

He put a fist on his heart when I approached, the Socairan version of a salute, and I nodded in return.

“I hear we have sustained high casualties,” I said without preamble.

“Yes,” he replied somberly. “Maxim fell.”

“I’m sorry.” The ineffectual words were barely a whisper.

Andrei leveled a look at me. “I wondered if I would live to regret following a woman into battle.”

I suppressed a flinch, but he went on.

“But you were a sight to behold, Highness,” he said with a trace of awe. “If the men hadn’t rallied to you the way they did, we would have lost far more. We all knew the risks coming into this, and it was worth it, for the life you promised. My family’s belly was full this week for the first time in years, but you gave us more than food.”

He met my eyes solidly. “You gave us hope.”

I nodded, a little stunned. All I could do was put a hand on his arm, but I hoped it conveyed my gratitude at the words I desperately needed to hear.

Clearing my throat, I returned to business.

“And the wounded, they were tended to?” I verified.

“Very thoroughly.” Something like amusement crept into his tone. “Some of the men were quite reluctant to leave.”

I shot him a questioning look, and he walked me next door where the sick bay was.

My eyebrows climbed in surprise. There were...women. Everywhere. Getting water, stitching wounds, holding vomit bowls, everything. And not just village women.

I recognized several noblewomen as well, including Lady Katerina, her sleeves pushed back to her elbows and a determined frown on her face as she cleansed a particularly nasty wound.

A smile tugged at my lips when I realized what Andrei meant about the men being reluctant to leave.

“Everything seems to be in order for now, then,” I said. “I’ll get more information and check back in the next couple of days. In the meantime, send word if you need anything.”

He put his fist over his heart again. “Thank you, Highness.”