Page 98 of Crimson Kingdom
The tears that had been pricking at my eyes spilled down my cheeks.
“You don’t want that,” I choked out.
“Maybe not that last one,” he amended, and I could hear the smirk in his tone. “But I would put up with it for you.”
He paused to pay special attention to one of my scars, setting my nerve endings on fire. “I want to spend every night exploring each inch of your perfect body, and every morning waking up with you wrapped around me.”
Heat washed over me, and my breaths came faster, but he wasn’t finished.
“Most of all, I want the chaos and laughter and life that you bring with you everywhere you go, and I want it always. I want you, always. As my wife, in every possible sense of the word.”
He finally finished with my buttons, coming to step on the other side of me.
His gray eyes were churning with intensity and the kind of vulnerability I had never witnessed from him before as he brought his thumbs up to brush away my tears.
“And, Lemmikki?” he said softly. “I love you with every last broken piece of my soul, too.”
With that singularly unguarded comment, any last wavering, prideful wall inside me came tumbling down.
I had never wanted a love that could break me. But, looking at Evander now, I knew that I would choose to be broken by him again and again for the rest of my masochistic life if that was the cost of loving him.
Of being loved by him.
CHAPTERFIFTY-ONE
My insides were still churning, but it was in anticipation now. My fists clenched nervously, reminding me that I still held the vial.
“I want all of those things, too,” I told him. “And I do want to grow our family one day...but I don’t think I’m ready to share you yet.”
I studied his reaction carefully, wondering if that would bother him, but he only chuckled under his breath.
“I would prefer not to share you, either, just yet.”.
Relief coursed through me, and I unstoppered the vial, swallowing down the bitter herbs. Evander poured me a glass of wine, which I gratefully accepted.
He waited for me to take a few sips and set it down before he leaned in, placing his hands on my shoulders while his lips traced a gentle line from my forehead to my mouth.
When his fingers reached the open sides of my dress, he backed away far enough to raise his eyebrows slightly, a request for permission.
All hesitation had vanished, as far as taking this step went. I trusted Evander. Loved him. Wanted him.
Now...there was only one small problem.
“I want you, Evander.Allof you,” I said significantly, and his lips quirked into the cocky smirk that pulled at things low in my belly.
“But I...” I forced myself to meet his eyes. “I don’t know...what I’m doing.”
The words were quiet, and I fought to keep a flush from creeping into my cheeks.
His lips parted, probably at my uncharacteristic admission.
“Lemmikki,” he said in a low tone. “You could never be anything other than perfect to me. We’ll take things slowly.”
His words washed away the final dregs of my apprehension. I dipped my chin in assent, and he eased the dress down off my arms, his fingers leaving trails of fire along my skin.
Then the dress was off, pooling at my feet and leaving me standing in only my flimsy, lacey white underthings. His hungry gaze swept over me, the desire on his features so strong it made my breath hitch in my throat.
Suddenly, I wasn’t sure I wanted to take him up on his offer to take things slow.