Page 19 of A Heart of Little Faith

As Claire set up the game, he studied the photos on display. The majority of them featured Claire in different stages of her life. Some portrayed older people in them whom Gideon assumed were grandparents. A grouping on the wall caught his eye, and he went over to examine it closely. Professional black and white photos, one showed Claire as a toddler. A close-up of her profile, it emphasized her upturned nose and rosebud lips. A second showed Claire, Lily and a man Gideon assumed was the father, lying on the ground, heads touching. He studied the man, noticing a strong resemblance between father and daughter. Lily appeared carefree and happy, and somehow different. He rubbed his chest as regret over her loss washed over him.

The sound of footsteps returned his attention to the room. He looked up as Lily passed by. Now he knew the difference—in the picture, her face glowed and her joy suffused every part of her body. In person, as Gideon knew her, she held herself apart and carried the weight of the world on her shoulders. He could see it in her eyes, in the smile that never quite penetrated them. He wished he could make her happy.

He returned to Claire distracted, as he wondered how to lighten Lily’s load. “Just a minute, Claire,” Gideon said, and headed toward Lily’s bedroom. He paused in the doorway. “Do you want any help with anything?”

Lily raised an eyebrow. “With my laundry?”

Gideon’s face heated as he noticed piles of neatly folded clothes on the bed and freshly laundered ones still in the basket. Timing had never been his strong suit. “Sorry, I didn’t realize what you were doing.” He went back to Claire.

She stopped him with light pressure on his shoulder. “Thanks. I appreciate it. But I’m okay, and I’ll be out to join you in a minute or two.” Her touch filled him as much as her gratitude did, which was so different from his usual response when people offered to help him. It made him think. Five minutes later, she joined them, sitting crossways on the chair as her legs dangled over the arm. He wished he could reach over and hold her hand, but that would turn this into something else, and he wasn’t ready for that now.Could I be?

As Gideon and Claire played the game, he watched Lily surreptitiously. She bit her lower lip between her teeth and her feet swung to a beat only she could hear. She twirled a length of hair between her fingers, and smiled at her daughter’s antics. Several times, she caught his gaze when Claire did something funny, as if sharing a private moment with him.She is beautiful.He pressed the bubble, heard the click and watched the die tumble. He couldn’t deny it—beautiful to look at and to be with.Maybe it will work, he told himself.

Maybe they could be friends, and maybe it would be okay if something developed between them. What harm could there be in getting attached? His chest expanded at his change in attitude. His heart began to thaw. And as Claire jumped up and declared herself the winner, Gideon caught Lily’s eye once again and smiled. He held his breath. Maybe a little piece of the happiness he’d witnessed today could be his. Finally.

Chapter 7

Joe stuck his head in Gideon’s office on Tuesday afternoon. “Hey, meet us at McNulty’s for beers after work.”

Gideon looked up from his desk and removed his glasses. His dry, gritty eyes burned and his neck ached from sitting hunched at the computer all morning. He’d been buried in his presentation. It took a moment for him to register the command. Nothing appealed to him less than drinks with his boss. He still had his daily exercise regimen to do to keep his leg muscles limber and toned, and he’d been anticipating a night in front of the TV. Despite an inward sigh, he put his glasses back on and nodded. “Meet you there around six,” Joe said.

A few hours later, Gideon headed over to the bar. McNulty’s was their regular hangout and he smelled the mingled scents of beer and hot sauce before he entered. Street level, with wide doorways, it was one of the few local neighborhood bars that could accommodate him and his chair. He entered and paused briefly as his sight adjusted to the dim light. His wheels made a sucking sound as they rolled across the sticky floor. To his left was the bar, teeming with the happy-hour crowd. A cloud of perfume, hairspray and aftershave hung over them. He spared the crowd only a cursory glance as he wheeled to the tables in the back where Joe and several others sat, including his friends Bill and Mark.

“Hey.” Someone gave him a beer and he nodded his thanks. The bottle chilled his skin and provided welcome relief to the stuffiness of the bar.

“How’s it going?” he asked as he sipped the salty, slightly bitter amber froth. He rolled the liquid around in his mouth before swallowing it, prolonging his enjoyment.

Joe, hair slicked away from his forehead, shirt collar undone, gaze roving, was in the midst of a story and all the guys snickered as he wrapped it up. Their regular waitress glided over with more beers, and Joe ogled her chest and patted her rear end as she moved onto another table. Accustomed to his behavior, she winked and sashayed away.

“So anyone do anything interesting this weekend?” Joe dragged his gaze away from the retreating waitress.

“Kim and I went to the movies,” Mark said.

“Yeah, what’d you see?” Bill asked. When Mark answered, Gideon nodded.

“We saw that a couple of weeks ago,” he said.

“We? Who’s we?” Mark asked and turned with interest to him.

“Just my sister and her friend,” Gideon replied as he sipped his beer and searched for the waitress. He wanted to order Buffalo wings, but she was nowhere to be seen.

“Boyfriend?”

“No, a woman.”

Everyone eyed him as if he held the key to a million-dollar treasure chest.Great, just what I need. Spectators.

“Yeah, what’s her name?” Mark asked, his beer forgotten for the moment.

“Lily.” Gideon flagged the waitress and placed his order. He hoped she would distract the rest of the table, but not even her skin-tight, cleavage-bearing halter could divert their attention.

“Is she hot?” Joe’s voice boomed as usual, and drew brief stares from patrons who sat nearby. Joe reminded Gideon of Anne, except he got the feeling she asked filter-less questions out of curiosity. Joe seemed to like the attention. Accustomed to stares, Gideon ignored the extra attention and attempted to wiggle out of this jam.Why did I say anything in the first place?He possessed a decent sense of humor, but there were some things he couldn’t find amusing. His relationship, or lack thereof, with a woman, was one of them. Unfortunately, with Joe’s focus solely on him, it wasn’t possible to avoid it. Regardless of whether or not he thought Lily was hot, if he tempered his opinions, Joe would lose interest as soon as possible.

“She’s nice looking.” He remembered how sexy but understated she was, the sparkle in her eyes when she laughed at Claire, and lilt of her voice.

“Ooh, nice,” Joe hissed as he winced. Then he got serious and asked, “Are you banging her? Because if not, I’ve got someone for you. She’s young, great body and works on Wall Street.”

He repressed a shudder. “Lily’s just a friend, Joe.”