Page 74 of Full Court Love
Preparations for these games are more extensive than any other games of the season. We’re watching hours of film, having walk-throughs and shoot-arounds, yoga, extra shooting, and scouting material to read up on the teams we're facing.
The only person who loves it more than me is Lucy. She lives and breathes this. Not that I want to take all the credit, but she’s told me that her anxiety has subsided into normal nerves since I came into her life. Now she just gets to enjoythe peak of the season and jump into her preparation headfirst.
My heart soared when she revealed this information. I hold that fact like a badge of honor. Making her feel like she is so much more than an athlete, and that basketball doesn’t have to dictate her happiness or the feelings of those around her–that might be my greatest accomplishment.
I wasn’t lying, either. At this point I will basically do anything or live anywhere as long as it’s with her.
But it’s clear she does love this game.
She loves playing and competing. She loves her team. She loves representing her school. She’s like Mozart on the court, and I’m entranced by her. As we watch the women’s team destroy their first-round opponent, I can’t help but laugh. I’m sitting with the guys on my own team, and a couple of them glance over at me with concerned looks.
Tyler’s got his eyebrows raised. “Want to let us in on the joke?”
I lean back, gesturing at the court as Lucy hits a step-back three. “She’s so good, it’s not even fair. I mean…”
We all turn our attention to the court as Lucy nabs a steal and throws a dime to Jacey for a layup. The rest of the guys let out a collective chuckle.
“Wow, it’s almost like you planned that.” Rashaun is shaking his head with me now.
“Or she’s doing highlight-worthy things almost every single play.”
PJ leans forward from his seat directly behind me so our faces are almost touching. His voice is threatening in my ear. “Don’t mess this up, you idiot.”
“Wait. Why am I an idiot if I haven’t messed it up yet?”
“Because you almost did, so I’m assuming you have more screwups lined up and ready to go.”
Everyone laughs, but my stomach drops. He’s not wrong. It’s my biggest fear. Hurting her. Losing her. Giving her areason to remember how out of my league she is or remember that I already hurt her once. These are the thoughts that plague my nightmares. Thanks for the reminder, PJ.
But as Lucy glances up my way and a smile lights up her face, it’s like all my fears remember that they’re afraid of the sun. They can’t survive the glow Lucy casts over my existence.
Lucy is everything warm and bright and good.
She deserves someone who will fight to keep her radiance ablaze.
I want to be that someone more than anything. However, I know I have to rise to the challenge and take on an opponent I’ve never been willing to face before.
My big battle on that front is coming soon.
I just pray I’m up to the task.
CHAPTER 31
LUCY
Jordan is my lucky charm. It’s the only logical explanation for how much my anxiety has eased and I’m playing better than I ever have in my entire life.
Don’t get me wrong, I’ve worked really hard. But this is another level.
We just won our second-round game handily. It wasn’t as much of a blowout as the first round, but all the starters were still able to rest for almost the entire last five minutes. It was fun to cheer on the rest of the girls who don’t typically get as much playing time–even Sasha.
Although, she didn’t seem to be having much fun. In fact, she looked positively miserable. After each possession, she would glance up into the crowd toward where I assume her parents were sitting. As much as I’m not a fan of hers and we’re certainly never going to be close friends, my heart is breaking for her.
I’m even starting to feel a little guilty about blowing up at her after the social media fiasco.
Just a little, though.
I would categorize my emotion as “righteous anger” because I was defending Jordan, so in that way, it felt justified.Or at least that’s what I tell myself so I don’t descend into a guilt spiral. Putting someone on blast with an audience is not something I ever want to do again.