Page 36 of Wrapped in Winter
“It really was. I was seeing things I had only seen in the movies.” I waggle my brows so she gets my drift, but then we fall silent. “That was the last party I’d ever go to with her.” I bite my bottom lip. No amount of talking about her ever makes it easier. I love to remember, but it’s so damn hard at the same time.
“I’m sorry,” she whispers out and sits up, wrapping herself around me.
“It was a great night, and I’ll always hold onto that memory.”
“Thank you for telling me.” She kisses my chest again and curls back into my side. “How did she die?”
Her voice is almost inaudible, but I was waiting for that question. “She was in a car accident a month before graduation.”
“Oh, Drake.”
I bite my bottom lip, trying to maintain my composure. “It was the hardest day of my life. Until the funeral beat it. But graduation? That day was the worst. My parents insisted we go. We needed to show up as a solid family in front of the town. I remember staring at the empty chair in the middle of her friends and classmates. And then they called her name and the silence that fell over the crowd was so incredibly loud.” I swallow hard. “I know that makes absolutely no sense, but it's the only way to describe it.”
She nods. “I understand perfectly. When my dad died, I remember standing in the funeral home wishing for silence. The cries, the talking, the constant tapping of someone's foot on the floor had me screaming inside. But when I went home and laid in bed that night, the house was so eerily quiet I couldn’t sleep. I was waiting for a noise that never came.”
“Do you want to tell me about Lily’s dad?” Her body stiffens against me, but I just wait for her to answer. I’ve a feeling she’s never really opened up about any of this, and I want to be the one she does it for.
“There’s nothing to really tell. I met him when I was in New York. He showed me a flashy lifestyle that I’d never seen before. It was fast and exciting but would never lead to anything good. Of course, at the time, I didn’t think that, but looking back now, it was a disaster.”
I hear such a difference in her voice. Speaking of her dad, it’s solemn but is loaded with sorrow. When she talks about Lily’s dad, it almost sounds like relief. “Do you miss him?”
She pulls back from me. “Why would you ask me that?”
“Because I need to know who I’m competing with here, January. If he’s got a place in here,” I tap her chest over heart, “I need to know there’s room for me too.”
She drops her eyes from me and shakes her head before lifting them again, shiny and red. “I don’t miss him.” She whispers it so softly I almost miss it. “I don’t miss him,” she says a bit stronger this time, “and that makes me a terrible person.”
“Hey, no it doesn’t.” I pull her close, my anger beginning to rise because, without knowing a single thing about him, I can just tell this guy clearly was not good to her.
“He made life… hard.” She finishes the sentence and I know not to push. That wall I brought down earlier is beginning to go back up.
I cradle her into my side, pulling her sheets up around us again. “Then let me make it easy.”
“I’m anything but easy.”
“The bathroom at the Range Bar and Grill says differently.” I squeeze her, letting her know I’m joking but also hoping to break the tension.
“I’m serious, Drake. Our family is broken, and life with a daughter is going to only get harder.”
“Nothing is broken, January. But I think rebuilding a life with someone, learning how good it can be, how itshouldbe, would be pretty amazing.”
“How do you know that at twenty-six years old?”
“How don’t you know it at thirty?” I counter her, and she watches me so intently. “I know what you’re thinking. You're thinking I’m too good to be true, and you know what? You’d be right.” I snicker as she smacks my chest. “I didn't know I wanted any of this, I just saw a gorgeous blonde and had to know more. And so far, I’m really liking what I know.”
Chapter 15
January
Islowly come awake to the sun’s warm rays pouring in through the windows. I squint as I open my eyes, then quickly bury my head in the pillow. I turn over and stretch, and my body feels different. Memories of Drake and I come rushing back: how he took his time, how he didn’t take his time, how he was strong and steady then losing control at times, and I loved every minute of it. I loved seeing him come undone just for me.
He’s romantic and emotional and he’s not afraid to let it show. It’s new to me, because what Sean demonstrated was fake. Fake enough to make me believe him. But Drake is a good man. He’s a solid force who listens, who knows how to be playful, and who can comfort too.
And I’m beginning to think it would be okay to let him in. And to let him stay.
I reach behind me and pat the empty bed, and a bit of disappointment rushes through me. I don’t know why I thought he would stay. We never talked about that. I just invited him back for nothing more than to be close to him. But today isLily’s birthday party, and the last thing I need is for her to come walking in with my sister and find Drake and me in bed.
I turn, facing the pillow he slept on, inhaling his scent, and grabbing my phone to check the time. Then I see a text.