Page 60 of Tormented
“What would you suggest?” A mind as equally dark must harbor some delicious ideas.
She smirks, pulling the straw from between her teeth. “Ad-lib.”
“Huh?”
“Make it up as you go along. If you plan it out beforehand, it kind of takes the fun away, don’t you think? I mean, you’ve already assumed how he’s going to react, so then when he does, it’s no fun.”
Jesus. She’s seriously working on my moral obligation to not force women anymore. My hands are itching to pick her up and carry her to the nearest bed so I can fucking lay claim to this piece of work. “That so?” I manage to finally choke out. She keeps this murder talk up and I’ll have her down at the courthouse with a ring on her finger tomorrow.
“Yep. Play it by ear. He squeals: do it again. He smiles: try the other foot.” She chuckles, the cutest fucking sound since . . . well, shit, since Dana sighing against my chest after I popped her cherry.
You’re so weak . . .
At least I have a heart, you black-souled motherfuc—
“You okay?” Abbey straightens, turning her full attention on me. “You want some fresh air or something?”
Lost her already . . .
Shut up.
Ever since moving to Cali, it’s as though the sunshine’s only fostered the growth of the fucker in my head. He’s always there. More than he’s ever been, tearing me down and making me weak.
Not that it’s hard. You never could keep it together long enough . . . .
“Sawyer?”
Look at her . . . look at the pity in her eyes . . . .
I back away, shaking my head as Abbey frowns. “You get any more trouble . . .”
Like you? Ha ha ha . . .
Fuck.
“Did I say something wrong?”
She can’t see me, not when it’s like this. “No. Nothin’ wrong, girl.”
That’s it, you pussy. Fucking run away again . . .
I stare down at the floor, hands gripped tight to the hair above my temples as I sidestep Abbey and head out the front to the dark serenity of the yard. What kind of weak fuck am I? I can’t even look at her, see the sadness in her eyes, see the way she feels sorry for me.
There’s nothing to feel sorry for. She didn’t do this.
Fuck. Neither did I.
He did.
That soulless bastard who sired me fucking made me this way, and the time for him to pay can’t come soon enough.
You’ll never be able to go through with it . . .