Page 49 of Mountain Bean Dream
“It’s me. I’m super reactive, and it sparked an unfavourable memory.” For good measure, I loaded another forkful and took a bite.
“You don’t have to do that for me.”
“I didn’t. I’m doing it for me.”
Chapter Sixteen
The next day, for some unexpected reason, I felt lighter in my steps and definitely happier in my soul than I’d felt in a long time. For the first night in as many nights, I hadn’t dreamt of Derek. In fact, to my sweet relief, I didn’t dream at all.
A boost of confidence filled my soul as when I stretched my back, I also tested my elbow. Super stiff and also the ugliest shade of purple to taint the skin, I tested my luck and tried to lift it into the proper position for playing my flute.
Bending at the waist and rolling my shoulders in, I grunted to bring my left arm up just high enough to mimic where the flute would go. However, my right hand had to bend at an awkward angle, and my chin had to tuck inwards more which would affect the way I blew across the mouthpiece.
“Bitter beans!”
So much for my good mood.
Although I reminded myself, I still had five days to the concert. There was still time to get it into a position, or at least make a new position work. One day at a time.
I spent the day rearranging my bookshelves, sorting them by spine colour rather than by genre, and when those fifteen minutes had passed, I reread the last text message exchanges between my mom and me, and that of my brother. All of us had said some of the most unpleasant things, and we were all out to inflict the most pain. Reading it over, it was clear there were no winners in those arguments, but I wondered if they missed me like I was missing them?
I loved the solitude of Jasper and had selected this town because when Prince Harry and Meghan stayed here on their honeymoon, they were left alone. If two of the most well-known people could find privacy here, surely, I’d encounter the same.And so far, I had.
But that came with a price. I was lonely. Desperately lonely. I wanted friends who knew me, and until I could share that part of myself, I made do with enjoying my time with Jeremy, even if it was more than just making do. With him, I was relaxed and free to be the version of myself I yearned to be. There was no pressure to be the star. No one was hovering over me making sure I said the right thing, or that I did the right thing. I was just me; lonely ole me.
I prepped a small charcuterie board for Sage, looking forward to our girls’ moment. To hang out, do hair, and have fun.
She knocked on my door at ten minutes after four and wrapped me in a gentle hug, making sure to not squeeze me too hard.
“I’m so excited for this.” She practically clapped her hands.
“Me too. I made us some snacks.”
“Oh, you shouldn’t have. I can’t stay long as Elliot and I are meeting Harvey and Nina on a project. I told them I’d be a little late as I promised you I’d help with your hair.”
Inside my heart was squeezing, but I made sure to not let that affect my face. “No problem. Jeremy wants me ready for five anyway. Will that give you enough time to braid it?”
“A braid is easy.”
“Like Leia’s when she was on Hoth? From Star Wars?”
Sage stared and shook her head. “I don’t remember what that looks like. I’ve only seen that movie once.”
There was no need for me to explain how many movies there were, how many spin-offs had been created, and how many books in various series there were. Time wasn’t a luxury at the moment.
I found a picture on the web of the hairstyle I wanted, andthen a video.
Twisting a chair around, I sat down and talked all things Star Wars while Sage followed the directions. Within twenty minutes, I had the perfect braided crown.
“It’s lovely,” I said, touching it. “Thank you.”
“My pleasure. My sister and I used to play hair all the time when we were younger. It was so much fun.”
“I wish I had a sister; an instant best friend.” The words fell out before I could stop them.
“It isn’t always easy and there are a lot of head-butting moments, but yeah, it’s nice to have an instant best friend.” She sat on one of the other chairs, smiling and crossing her long legs as she pointed toward my recently reorganized bookshelf. “Since you read a lot, you should join our book club. We meet once a month at our house and discuss whatever book was selected for the first twenty minutes. Then we have a second supper, copious glasses of wine, and we share lots of laughs. It’s a ton of fun.” She twirled the ends of her blonde hair around her finger. “You should think about it. Our next meetup is next Friday.”
“What if I haven’t read the book?”