Page 107 of Proposal Play
DOUBLE OR NOTHING
Asher
I should focus on beating Miles at pool. I’m only a few shots from bragging rights. The trouble is, as I line up the cue, I can’t swat away a persistent thought—how the hell do I convince Maeve to stay?My chest tightens, and my brain keeps replaying the question on a loop as I move around the pool table with my teammate, post-workout.
It won’t leave me alone. I wish it were a simple question I could ask Google. I line up the shot, but the thought nags at me again, and the ball goes screaming past the pocket, just missing.
Miles shakes his head, giving me a sympathetic look from behind the black glasses he often wears off the ice. “I am so, so sorry you suck,” he says, then pushes up the sleeves of his Henley, revealing ink of an arrow on one arm. For focus, he’s said. And focus the fucker does. It’s almost like he’s sayingsit down and watch how it’s doneashe moves around the pool table, cleaning up the rest of the balls with practiced ease.
When he’s done, he wiggles his fingers. “Now, pay up.”
“In my own home?”
“Even more so. That’s embarrassing, man—for you,” he says with a grin.
“With friends like you...” I say, but I’m not ready to end the game. The last thing I want is to be left alone with my spinning thoughts. “Double or nothing?”
“You are a glutton for punishment, and I can’t resist,” he says, already resetting the balls for another round.
But once he starts racking them up, the question plays in my head again. Shit. I need to deal with this. “Dude,” I start.
He stops, looks up, no doubt hearing the urgency in my tone. “What’s up?”
“I want Maeve to stay.”
His brow knits, then he nods. “This isn’t fake for you.”
That’s all he has to say. He knows the score. They all have, honestly. For longer than I have maybe. But in Boston, I barely admitted I had feelings for her, only sayingshe was great. I’m getting a little tired of that refrain.
“It’s not,” I admit, sighing heavily. “Not one bit. Not at all.”
He pauses, the cue in hand. “Okay, so ask her to stay. Make it work. Give it a shot.” Miles studies me. “Right?”
“In theory, yes. But it could never work for real.”
He scoffs. “Why?”
I don’t want to get into my faulty heart right now and the way it sputters out, so I just say, “We’re friends and all.”
“That’s your reason, man?”
“That’s a damn good reason,” I argue. “I mean, we have a lot of history and…stuff. I don’t want to risk that.”
“Sure, I get that. But all thatit’s complicatedstuff is just bullshit at the end of the day, Callahan. If you want her to stay, ask her. Sounds like the perfect opportunity to work your shit out. Maybe, if you’re lucky, you can win her over. Stranger things have happened. And maybe it’s finally time—you’ve been in love with her for years.”
I drag a hand through my hair, letting that one word sink in—years.
No.
That can’t be possible.
It can’t have been years. I’ve barely come to terms with my feelings for her since we saidI do, with the depth of them, the weight of them, the danger of them. There’s no way it’s been going on for years. That’s just not possible. But it’s definitely been for longer than I’d realized. Problem is whether or not I’m in love with her doesn’t entirely matter, given my track record, given my past. “Just because you’re in love doesn’t mean you stay in love,” I point out.
“True, but so what?”
I furrow my brow. “So what?” I repeat.
He levels me with a stare as he lines up his next shot. “You think love comes with a guarantee? It’s not a Hydro Flask. Does hockey come with a guarantee? Every time you get on the ice could be your last time. Every time you leave your house could be the last time,” he says.