Page 78 of Never Bargain with the Boss
Her eyes implore me to agree with her, but I think she knows there’s no way a baby would have that memory. So I kiss her forehead and remind her, “Babies don’t create memories like you and I do now. It’s not snapshots, like a picture in your head.” I tap my head. “Their memories are feelings—like safety and security, love and trusting that their needs will be met. And you have those memories.” I place a hand over my heart. “From your mom and your dad, because both of them loved and love you so much.”
“Do you remember your mom?” she blurts out.
There’s a pinch in my heart and a frog in my throat, but I nod, being honest. “I was older than you were when my mom died, and she was sick for a while before that. She knew she didn’t have long and spent a lot of time trying to put all these vivid images in my head so I’d have them after she was gone. So yeah, I remember things about her, like she always put rainbow sprinkles on my ice cream but chocolate ones on hers, but even still, what I remember most is an overwhelming sense of love.”
“That makes sense,” she says, sounding way more mature than her young years. But in the same way my life has aged me, forcing me to mature faster than others sometimes, Grace has done that too, living an experience well beyond her years. “I just wish I had a mom sometimes, you know? Like I wonder what it would be like if she were still here. I mean, not that you’re not great!”
I laugh. “It’s okay, Grace. I’m not your mom. No one will ever be her. But I’m very glad to have some little part in helping you become who you’re going to be. Because I think you’re going tobe amazing.” I grin as I lean her way and whisper, “I kinda think you already are.”
A soft smile slowly blooms on her lips. “Thank you. I think you’re amazing too.”
“And it’s okay to wonder what life would’ve been like if your mom were still alive. But don’t get too stuck in what-ifs… maybe it’d be a picture-perfect life like you wish it’d be… or maybe any of a million other things could’ve happened between then and now. There’s no way to know.”
“So just stick to the what-is?” she asks. “Even if reality sucks sometimes?”
“Yeah,” I admit sadly. “Sometimes, bad things happen. But they don’t define us. They don’t make us stronger, or better, or any other cliché thing. They just… happen.” It’s a cold, hard truth of life I think she can relate to more than most children her age. “And sometimes, the bad things put us on an entirely different path than we ever thought we’d be on. That’s not good or bad, it’s just… different, and that’s okay too.”
Emmett burps loudly, and we both giggle. Letting Grace think about what I’ve said, I move to the floor, getting the baby set up with toys all around him. After a minute, Grace sits down beside me too, her back against the couch.
“I think this different is good… now that you’re here,” she informs me.
“I think it’s good too,” I reply, astounded by her maturity and smarts and big, big heart. “Now that I’m with you and your dad.”
Austin had better look out. He’s run me off jobs before. But without my even realizing it, I’ve been slowly getting stronger over the years, less and less susceptible to his manipulations, and now, I’m done with him. This time, I’m digging my heels in, putting in some deep roots, and I will go to war to keep this family. Cameron, who says he wants more with me, and Grace, who seems open to my being a part of their family in some way.
I’m sure Austin thinks I’ll run the way I always have. But that’s not happening.
And if push comes to shove, I will destroy Austin if that’s what it takes for me to finally be happy.
CAMERON
“Holy shit!” Riley exclaims, and immediately, both hands cover her mouth. From behind her palms, she mutters, “Sorry, but… holy shit!” Her eyes stare out the front windshield, and in the backseat, Grace starts laughing at Riley’s curse word-filled outburst.
It’s completely expected, given she’s seeing my family home for the first time. It’s obnoxiously huge, with a sweeping staircase up to a double-door entrance, an artificial turf front yard that’s bright green despite the season, and a ridiculous statue-filled fountain in the front.
“It’s pretty big, huh?” Grace giggles. “But it’s just MeeMaw H’s and PawPaw H’s house. There’s a pool, a pool table, and a movie room too.”
“Well, silly me, I forgot my swimsuit… considering it's November,” Riley jokes dryly.
“Oh, the pool’s heated. We can swim year-round,” Grace corrects, not catching the sarcasm at all. To her, this really is just her grandparents’ home, nothing unusual about it in the slightest.
As I park, I turn my head toward Riley. Her gaze is still drawn to the massive display of ridiculous wealth in front of her. Thereare so many questions visible on her face, and I move to reassure her. “You already met my mom and all the women in my family, plus Cole, who’s the hardest to win over. It’ll be fine.”
I hope I’m right. My other brothers aren’t exactly walks in the park, but Cole is definitely the least civilized of us all, and having him on Riley’s side—plus me, obviously—will serve her well if anyone tries to give her a hard time.
I shouldn’t worry, though, because Riley has the biggest cheerleader of all on her side. Grace. My daughter grabs Riley’s hand as soon as they’re out of the car and very nearly drags her to the front door. She doesn’t bother knocking but rather swings the door open wide and announces, “MeeMaw! We’re here!”
No matter how many zeroes are in our combined bank accounts, at the end of the day, we’re just family, and at Grace’s shout, everyone comes hustling into the foyer to meet the newcomer who’s sent me reeling. Luckily, it’s Mom at the front of the pack, probably because no one is willing to risk running her over.
“Riley, dear… I’m so glad you came,” Mom tells her warmly while simultaneously wrapping her in a hug.
“Thank you for having me,” Riley replies. “Your home is so…”
“Gaudy,” Kyle suggests loud enough for everyone to hear.
Riley flinches and rushes to finish her sentence. “I was going to say lovely.”
Mom pats her hand with an easy smile. “Ignore him. In fact, ignore all of the boys. They’ve been riled up since Cam said he was bringing you. I’m afraid he’s got some reaping of what he’s sown coming.” Mom flashes me a quick look of warning before returning to her hostess duties, taking Riley’s coat. “Cameron, would you like to do the honors?” she prompts me, making me feel like I’m a stupid teenager again who needs coaching on the basic rules of civilized society.