Page 29 of Gilded Lies

“I’ll shoot you a list.” He returns to my side, slips his arm around my middle, and I rest my head on his shoulder. I haven’t allowed myself to make friends outside of my men. No one wants to have drinks with the manager, and I accept that. But Raja has been there for me from day one of me stepping foot in Seattle. As far as I know he’s always told me the truth.

“Raja?”

“Yes, sweetheart?”

“What do you do when you want to confess the truth to someone but feel afraid they might judge you for your past?”

He steps back and looks down at me. “You tell them anyway and let the cards fall where they may. You can’t build a life on half-truths.” His hand settles on my cheek offering comfort and warmth. I haven’t cried in years but right now the kindness and understanding in his eyes has my heartstrings ready to open the floodgates.

I contemplate his words in silence. He’s right, but it doesn’t make what I have to do any easier.

“Thank you, Raja. I think I needed to hear those words more than I realized.” His expression softens, but there’s a pain lingering behind his thick lashes that doesn’t go unnoticed byme. He pulls me into him with an arm around my waist and presses his lips to the shell of my ear.

“If these men love you, they will accept you. All of you, sweetheart. If they don’t, let them go. I’m always here to catch you.”

His other arm comes around me, and his warmth bleeds into mine.

I pull back, shock coloring my expression I’m sure of it. “Oh, Raja. You never—” I start quietly, but I don’t have words to finish my sentence.

“—said anything?” he offers in a strained voice. His smile is small, pained. Resigned.

“You came here looking to get your life together. Forgive me for assuming, but you didn’t need an older man to save you. You have too much pride for that. Besides, there are many ways the people inside these walls could misconstrue a relationship between myself and the new manager.”

He means it would look like I slept my way to the top.

“And now you’ve found a group of men that have you smiling. That makes my heart happy.” He takes my face in his hands and presses a kiss to my forehead, one cheek and then the other. My eyes shutter closed at the heartache in his tone.

When I open them again, I find him regarding me with so much love in his eyes it nearly beats with a pulse of its own.

“Talk to your men, sweetheart. Everything will work out for you.”

“You know?”

“I do. Danika and his friends better not break your heart.”

He drops his hands from me and moves to leave. “There was one other thing I needed to ask you.” He turns, his heart in his eyes.

I want to go to him and throw my arms around him and thank him for being the friend I didn’t know I needed in my life, but I keep my feet glued to the floor.

“Do you think you can find me someone on your team who would be qualified for taking manager status at the Golden Key Society New Orleans?”

“Oh?” The change of topic is welcome.

“Yes,” he draws out casually.

“The last one resigned because she got pregnant. Which isn’t anything, really, but the daddies are members and well you know the rules. Which isn’t the worst of it. Now they want nothing to do with the poor woman.”

I nearly choke on my tongue trying not to gasp and trip over something to say that isn’t me confessing three members are currently trying to breed me. I settle on a nonchalant, “Oh, damn that is harsh.” My brows climb high as I fake my surprise at first and then pain for the woman. That had to hurt and given the time of year it must feel twice as bad. Some fuckers need dumped in a fresh batch of cement.

Listen to the words running through my head. Lord save me. I’m starting to think like Rune.

“I’m sorry about that.”

“It’s a pain, but it happens. You wouldn’t be interested would you?” There is hope in his tone.

I would hop on the chance to head south if my men wanted to leave the city life behind for a more laid-back southern approach. New Orleans is a city unlike any other, and it has aspects that remind me of my hometown. I’ll never go back to Savannah, but New Orleans would be a close second on my wish list.

Giving him false hope isn’t fair to him or myself. “New Orleans is mighty tempting, but my boss might have something to say about you stealing me away.”