Page 9 of Snowed In with My Ex

“Don’t worry. I’ll be fine.”

“What if there is snow or something? We’re from LA, Allie! Do you even know how to drive in snow?”

“I drove in it when we went to Running Springs that one time.”

“Those were small snow flurries that didn’t even stick! We’re both born and raised here. You really think you can survive?—“

“Survive? Dramatic, much?” I grinned. “I’ll be fine. I will fly there, grab groceries, and spend time at the cabin, maybe set up a Christmas tree.”

“You should stay here with me.”

“You only want me here so you have help with setting up and breaking down at the craft fairs,” I half-teased.

“That’s not true!” she gasped before she playfully winked. “Maybe a little true.”

We settled onto the couch and kept watching the movie, and for some reason, like usual, my thoughts drifted to Winston and all that could have been. After the movie ended, we each went to our rooms. While I was lying in bed, I picked up my phone. Just like I had when I woke up, I pulled up our pictures.

God, it felt good to look at them.

To see his eyes, his face.

The way he looked at me in candid shots we took. But it also hurt. Hurt so damn badly because I really thought we had beenit. That he’d been the one. Not that I’d told him that or even shared with him just how much I loved him.

I’d trusted my gut and gave him my heart. For what?

For him to wake up one day and change his mind? Just like that? Knowing it wasn’t healthy, and really knowing better, I scrolled through them only to go through our text chat. Like usual, I tried to figure out where things had changed. To pinpoint when whatever happened, happened. But no matter what, I couldn’t figure it out. All his messages had been laced with nothing but love and affection. By the time I scrolled to the last one, my fingers hovered over the chat box, and I started to type out a message. How many times had I done this? Written messages and then quickly deleted them?

Me: Hey, I know it’s late, and I know it’s been a moment, but I wanted to let you know I miss you.My finger hovered over the send button before I shook my head and deleted the message.

What would be the point?It wasn’t like he had reached out.

It was obvious that Winston Nash, as much as we had in common in and out of the bedroom, as hard as I’d fallen in love with a man who I’d thought understood me and my wants and needs more than anyone in the world, had moved on.

I just had to figure out how to do the same.

Winston

My knee bouncedwith anticipation as my hands clenched the steering wheel with a white-knuckled grip. These next couple of weeks would be different than the last month.No more regular schedule.

She was on vacation.

I was supposed to be, too.

But instead of doing something that made sense, like sleep in or stay the hell away from Allie, I sat in a rented SUV so she wouldn’t recognize the car across the street from her home and waited.

My gaze was pinned to the front of her place.

Then finally, fucking finally, the door opened. Just like that, I felt like I could breathe. I watched from my car as she stepped out of her house and looked up to the sky.

I loved how she did that every time she went anywhere.

Her eyes closed as she soaked in the sun’s brilliance, for even just a moment. I’d asked her about it once, and my girl had told me it was something she’d started after her dad had passed away.A moment of reflection,she had called it.

Funny how looking at her felt like soaking in the sun. Just the sight of her reminded of everything I had to be grateful for.

Even if she wasn’t mine anymore.

I noticed she wasn’t necessarily dressed to go to the gym like she usually did. She was dressed casually, and the bag over her shoulder seemed a little bigger than the ones she usually had with her.Maybe she’s finally heading to that yoga studio you had promised to go with her?I thought to myself and shook my head.