Page 24 of The Goalie

Seriously, Dan? Making love?

What the hell was happening to me and what could I do to fix it?

I pulled into the parking lot of Sam’s apartment. I might have to park on the street if I couldn’t find a vacant parking spot for visitors. I didn’t mind the search. It gave me a chance to calm myself down. It allowed me to figure out what I was doing.

I knew I wanted to be with Sam, but I was only starting to realize just how deeply that desire went. It wasn’t just sex. There was more to it.

I wasn’t lying when I told her I wanted to hang out with her.

“Goddammit.” I shook my head.

What had I gotten myself into? What was I going to do now? Everything had changed and it had been little over twenty-four hours. Was it that I was pathetic? Or was it that Sam was just…different from everyone else, from everyone who had come before her? And if it was the latter, then what did that mean, exactly? Did that mean I liked her, or did it mean I just liked having sex with her more than I liked having sex with everyone else?

I let out a breath.

I was ready to leave my car. I just played a two-and-a-half-hour game and I had all of this adrenaline buzzing inside of me like a fly in a lightbulb.

I opened the door and stood. I hoped the crisp air would slap me in the face, would remind me that I was being crazy, impulsive, completely unlike myself. However, it calmed me, reassured me that what I was doing was what I needed to do.

I took the stairs two at a time until I was at her door. I knocked. I probably should have controlled myself. I hoped she didn’t get spooked with me banging on the door at eleven thirty at night.

It took a moment before the door cracked open. She stood there, shrouded in the dim light of her home in her pajamas. I smiled at the sight. It was so typically Sam to be in pajamas despite the fact that she was now a woman. It made my heart burst with warmth, with something I never expected to feel for her.

Without waiting for her to invite me in, I stepped forward. She didn’t tell me to stop. She didn’t push me away. In fact, she took a step back and let me in with open arms. I coiled my arms around her waist and kissed her, hard. Using my right foot, I kicked the door shut. The noise did not startle us in the slightest. We were too consumed with each other to be concerned about a slamming door.

When we were forced to break apart for air, I continued to hold her tight.

“Tell me,” I all but demanded, my breathing ragged. “Tell me you want to be with me. Tell me this isn’t going to be the last time.”

She, too, was having difficulty controlling her breath. She nodded her head, biting her lip shyly.

I ducked my head, placing my lip on hers and sucking on her bottom lip. I wanted her to know that that lip was mine. I saw no reason for her to bite it unless she was purposefully trying to tease me, to tempt me. If that was her intention, she was doing a damn good job of it.

She nodded her head and I was forced to release her lips once again.

“Yes,” she said. Her hooded eyes locked with mine. Pink touched her cheeks. She reminded me of that shy girl in high school, the girl I thought I hated, the girl I now knew I loved.

“Yes…” I let my voice trail off. I knew what she was trying to say, but I wanted to hear it. I wasn’t trying to be difficult, but I needed to hear it. I needed her to tell me.

“I want you, Dan,” she said, her voice barely louder than a whisper. “I want you. But not just…this.” She gestured between us. “I want to explore what this means. I want to be lazy with you. I want to watch you play. I want to try this, whatever this is.”

I nodded my head. “Good,” I said. “Because I want it too.”

I crashed into her lips once again. Her fingers went to my hair, burying themselves in the locks, tugging and pulling and showing me just how much she wanted me.

We ripped each other’s clothes off. It wasn’t an exaggeration, either. She clawed at my shirt, leaving scratches along my arms and back. I ripped her panties in two with my bare hands. I could have done the same with the shirt she wore, but she tossed it over her head before I could get my hands on it.

At least I could get my hands on everything else.

Her body felt new and familiar at the same time. I didn’t understand how such a thing was possible, but it was.

I backed her up until the backs of her knees hit the arms of the couch and she practically toppled over, surprised. I held her steady. After another kiss, I placed my hands on her hips and spun her around until her back faced me. I put one hand on the small of her back, the other on her hip and pushed her down, her ass tilting up in the air.

I rubbed my hand on it, admiring it, feeling it. Without hesitation, I slapped her ass. She gasped and looked over her shoulder. I paused. I didn’t want to tense. I didn’t want to worry her or have her think that I doubted my own abilities. But God, I hoped I didn’t fuck this up.

Her mouth dropped open, but there was a glimmer in her eyes, something that said she liked it.

“You like that?” My cock got hard—hell, it was already hard just being around her, being near her naked body, her pussy just begging me to slam myself inside of her—but knowing that she liked a little bit of pain, of punishment, during an act that was supposed to feel so fucking good? I couldn’t fucking believe it. I got harder than I thought possible.