Page 84 of Santa's Baby

He nods. “Good thinking.”

I follow him as he leads the way, keeping my distance as we head through the mall. Being here together feels so risky, in case there are prying eyes. I’m probably being paranoid, but the combination of nerves upon nerves makes me especially on edge. The last thing I want at risk is my career right now. If things went tits up, my job would be the safety zone I’d run back to at full speed.

If.

There it is again. That sliver of hope. I’m daring to believe.

I’m a stupid ass sometimes.

Reuben brought his Santa suit in a holdall. I wait by the toilets as he dashes to get my outfit.

He presents me with a bag and I open it to take a peek. Stripy red and white tights, a green dress and a cute little fluffy hat with a bobble on top. I’ve got my red stilettos on under Reuben’s fresh pair of joggers. And I’ve got a pair of his boxer shorts on to stop my butt crack showing.

“You sure this is my size?”

“Positive,” he says.

“Really?”

“I know body shapes like a professional, Tiffany. Especially curvier ones.”

I get dressed up in a cubicle, and I’m impressed. Reuben has selected my outfit perfectly. My stripy tights fit nicely, and my elf dress doesn’t show too much cleavage – just a taster. The hem is a decent length, almost to the knee.

I put my hair up in the scrunchie I always keep in my bag and pop my hat on top. I check myself out in the mirror and it’s convincing. I kinda like it.

I’m about to leave when the door opens, and a little girl bounces on in with her mum. She’s one of my beautiful nightmares, about six years old, with red curls, and freckles dusting her cheeks. She has bright blue eyes – like Kian, and I get the familiar hit, right in the heart.

She stares open mouthed at me, her eyebrows high.

“Mummy, look! It’s an elf! An elf in the toilet!”

Her mum grins bright. “So it is.”

I fight the urge to freeze as the girl dashes over and wraps her arms around me, linking them tight around my thighs.

“Hey, elfie! Are you helping Santa?” She looks up at me. “I’m going to see him, you know? I’m going to ask him for a reindeer for Christmas. He’s got loads, hasn’t he? Do you think he’ll give me one?”

I can’t help but break into a smile. A reindeer, wow. Her mum gives me a silent grimace, and I come up with an answer on the spot. I drop to a crouch to meet her daughter eye to eye, my heart thumping.

“I don’t know about that, sweetie pie. Santa’s reindeers have to work really hard every Christmas, and I’m not sure he’ll be able to do without them. Especially not Rudolph.” I keep smiling as her grin drops. “But… he might be able to get you a really nice pretend one. A fluffy one that looks just like Rudolph. They areso good, almost like the real thing. PLUS, you can give them a cuddle. Real reindeers can be a bit grumpy sometimes, and they are hard to fit in your bedroom.”

Her face lights up as though I’ve just given her a revelation.

“That sounds really cool.”

I give her a pat on the back before I get to my feet, and her mum mouths athank you.

“Right, toilet time, Penny,” she says. “The grotto opens soon!”

I leave them to it, fighting the urge to burst into tears once I’m out of sight. I take deep, slow breaths and tell myself I can get through this. I can do it. I always fucking do.

The sight of Reuben waiting by the grotto allows my fears to fuck off a little. It brings back the rush of pureoh my fucking Godas I see him like that again, trussed up in his red suit and silly beard.

“Ho, ho, ho,” he says when I reach him, and I almost dive in for a hug before I remember that this is the grotto, and I’m just a helper here. A volunteer – not someone who woke up in Reuben Sinclair’s bed this morning, still feeling the shape of his fist in her pussy.

He introduces me to Evelyn and Jen, the other elves, and takes his spot in the Santa cavern. Evelyn is young, in her early twenties – tall and energetic with her long blonde hair in a plait. Jen is a lot older and has a real motherly quality to her. I like her from the off. She’s about the same size as I am, and we are in identical outfits. Ah-ha! No wonder Santa picked my costume just fine.

I get a shiver of panic at the thought there might be some history between them. She has a great smile, and shimmies her ass in her costume, joking as she says she could be my elf mother. She leans in and whispers ‘My husband thinks I look like an idiot in this garb, but he can piss off. I love elf time.’