Page 86 of Torn
After sexting with Kenzi, I feel like I’ve developed multiple personality disorder. One of me feels sick and ashamed of myself for being so weak and the other me can’t get her off my mind and is itching to recapture that exhilarating feeling with her again. Last night made me feel more alive than I have in a long time and now that I’ve had a taste of her, I want more.
So much more.
As I work on the engine of a beautiful old Indian motorcyclein the shop, my brain keeps rewinding back to the pictures she sent me. And her handwritten note. And the fact that she hasn’t texted me yet today.
Is she waiting for me to text her first?
Or is she mortified about the things we said to each other?
Does she regret sending me the photos?
My suck level is high when it comes to all things relationships.
When lunchtime rolls around, I lock myself in my office and give her a call. Texts are fun but I need to hear her voice.
“I was hoping you’d call me,” she says when she picks up, and I can hear the smile in her voice.
“Were you?”
“Yes.”
“It’s a good thing I called, then. I wouldn’t want to disappoint you.”
“I don’t think that’s possible,” she replies. “So, how’s your day? You must be tired.”
“It’s the usual Monday. And yeah I’m beat, but you’re worth it.”
“Well, thank you.”
“What are you doing today?”
“Not much. I’m having dinner with Aunt Katherine and her new boyfriend tonight.”
“Very nice. I’m happy for her, she deserves to be happy after what that asshole did to her.”
“Yeah, she really does. She seems pretty crazy about this new guy, so I hope it works out.”
I glance at my door to make sure no one’s around but lower my voice anyway.
“Kenzi, about last night—”
“Tor,” she interrupts. “You don’t have to say anything.”
“I feel like I should.”
“Sometimes saying nothing says more.”
I laugh into the phone. “You sound like your dad.”
“I do, don’t I?”
“Yeah.” I clear my throat. “I should probably go. I just wanted to hear your voice.”
“I really love you, Tor.”
She says it like she’s declaring the sky is blue. Without one tiny shred of doubt in her mind. Like she knows it’s what my heart needs to hear.
“I love you, too, Angel.”