Page 25 of The Predator

He slowly withdraws his hand, and I hate how much I miss his touch, his warmth. Fuck him.

"It wasn’t an illusion when your pussy clamped down on my cock and sucked my seed deep inside you. It wasn’t an illusion when you gave yourself to me, allowing me to claim you like no one else ever had.” His gaze pierces through me, sifting through all the vulnerable pieces I keep hidden.I let him in. I trusted him.How could I have been so naive? So stupid? “Maybe it isn’t just me who is delusional, maybe you are too?”

“I’m not. If I had to choose a husband it wouldn’t have been you.”

He lets out a humorless chuckle, “You sure do have a way with words.” The vein in his neck throbs, his irritation climbing. “Nothing you say, or do from this moment forward changes what is already done. Do whatever you must to come to terms with our marriage, tell yourself that you don’t want me. That in my arms isn’t where you feel safest. Tell yourself I forced you intothis loveless marriage. Prove me wrong, Little Prey. Show me how much you hate me, let me taste it, dig your claws into my skin. Hurt me like I know you want to. It’s okay. I can handle it. Because I know it will be worth the pain and suffering when I get to watch you fall in love with me—all. over. again.”

I keep my face turned away from him because I refuse to let him see the effect his words have on me. I hate that he’s right, and I hate it that even a moment in his presence makes my body betray itself. I don’t know why he killed his grandfather, but the reason doesn’t matter. He did it.

Whatever medication Dr. Brooks administered finally hits me, making my thoughts fuzzy and my body lighter. I can barely keep my eyes open, and because it feels so right I sink back against the pillow. The suffocating panic from earlier recedes, but I’m still reminded of what I’ve done, whathe’sdone.

He's not the man I thought he was.

There was never a second I was under the impression he was the good guy, a knight in shining armor, but I never considered that he might be a murderer.

The word rings in my mind, echoing in and out.

Murderer. Murderer. Murderer.

That’s what I am now, too. A killer. Murderer. I fight against the tears burning my eyes, but there’s no holding them back. I’m so broken now. Will there be enough pieces of me left to put back together? Will I still be the same girl, or a shell of the person I used to be?

A ragged sob rips from my chest, carrying the grief and pain of what I’ve done with it.How will I live with myself?Yes, Yanov deserved death, but not at my hands.Never my hands.I’m not a killer. That’s not who I am. I save animals from danger and defend the vulnerable.

And yet, you killed him.

Fresh tears slip down my cheeks, leaving cold trails in their wake. Through the mess of tears, I can only briefly make out Sebastian climbing up onto the bed while Dr. Brooks slips out of the room.

"Fuck. I can’t handle it when you cry. It makes me want to punch something.” Sebastian growls, literally growls. There’s something vulnerable in his voice, making me want to reach for him. “What is it, Little Prey? Talk to me. Please fucking talk to me, or I might go insane. If you’re mad at me, so be it. I don’t give a shit, just tell me how I can help you. How can I make you feel better, because when you cry I feel helpless, and I don’t like it.”

I shake my head, inadvertently wiping the tears off my cheeks onto the lush pillow. "It's just...I'm a murderer now. A killer. I killed him. I killed him, and I can’t…there’s so much blood. My father…when he finds out—” Another sob escapes me, and I spiral in my thoughts. I’m so tired. So exhausted. I want to sleep for a million years.

Without hesitation, Sebastian grabs me by the shoulders and rolls me to face him. I’m trapped in the memory, sinking deeper and deeper into the abyss. I’ll forever wear the mark of a killer on my conscience.

"Stop," he snaps. "Stop, please… I can’t fucking handle seeing you like this.” His voice softens a bit. “You’re a survivor, Elyse. You didn’t kill him because you wanted to. You did it because you had to. There is a difference. You’re not a monster. And you never have to worry about your father again. You’re safe now. Nothing, no one, can touch you.”

I stare back at him through the tears. Deep down I know I’ll never be safe. Protection comes at a cost, and while Sebastian might protect me from all the monsters living in our world, no one can save me from him. My treacherous heart will suffer the consequences.

"And what about when you can't keep me safe? What happens when your secrets are brought to light? If anyone finds out you killed your grandfather, then my safety disappears. Without you, I’m left to my father’s mercy.” Thewhat-if’scontinue to mount against me. Sebastian can protect me, yes, but if anyone finds out what he did…

I want to hurt him, make him hate me so maybe he’ll let me go. But even though my intention is to push him away, I'm not prepared for the icy rage trickling into his eyes. His grip tightens, his fingers digging into my flesh, hard enough to leave bruises. Maybe I just want him to hurt me, so I can prove to myself he really is the monster in all of this. I lick my lips. “Do it. I know you want to. Hurt me. End my life just like you ended his.”

Anger vibrates through his body, but he doesn’t lose his composure. No, Sebastian is a professional at keeping his mask of boredom in place.

“Why would I kill you, wife?” He cocks his head to the side, and an eerie calm blankets me. “Wouldn’t that defeat the purpose of marrying you? I made a vow, till death do us part, and I intend to keep it.”

“Then kill me now. I know what you did, and I could tell anyone at any time.”

A villainous grin appears on his lips, “But you won’t. You won’t tell anyone and not only because you’re afraid, but because you need me. Not for safety, or whatever the fuck you’ve built in your head but because you want me. You need my body, my cock, my mouth on you. Go ahead, lie to me again and say you don’t. ”

Anger churns in my gut. It’s the truth even if I don’t want to admit it, but I don’t need to say a single word for Sebastian to know he’s right.

“I hate you.” I curl my lip and spit the words at him.

"I’m sure.” He rolls his eyes. “Hate me all you want,wife, but it doesn’t change the truth. You need me, and you're mine.”

“I’m not yours. Don’t act like you give a shit about me.” I goad him, because I want his anger.I need it.Any other emotion and I might break down and give into that terrible need, the need to let him wrap me up in his arms and tell me everything is going to be okay.

I don’t get the reaction I intended. Ignoring me all together, he gives me his back, slips off the bed, and turns to walk to the door. Anger, sadness, and fear swirl deep in my gut.I love him, but why?He’s a monster. He’s like everyone else in my life. Everything I’ve tried to separate myself from.