Page 79 of My Bully's Crush: Vol1
Seeing that post had almost destroyed me, which was one big sign that I was far from over him.I was almost afraid of a relapse.That’s how bad it was.The thought of him sharing that with her, something I might never have, was the last straw.
“There is no pregnancy.I never touched her, not after we got married.Where are you going?”I walked away before I hit him again, back to being mad and frustrated.
“You say you want another chance, and you’re already back to lying to me, taking me for a fool.You forget that I know you.There’s no way you went five years without sex, and that sociopath would’ve killed you if you even dared look at another woman.This is pointless; I can’t do this with you.Thanks for telling me everything; you can go now.”
“Elena, look at me.You know me; you know me better than anyone else in this world….”
“That’s not true.How do I know that?I believed that before, even as messed up as you were, I always believed that I knew your heart.”
“I always believed that I knew you, that you would never hurt me because you knew me.I believed that you loved me enough never to hurt me, and you damn near destroyed me.”
“Elena.”
“No, stop.”I hated that hurt tone in his voice.Who was he to be hurt?Since when did he care about my feelings?“Do you know how many nights I thought of ending myself?Do you know the pain you caused and what you took from me?You took something that was so precious, so vital to me.You stole my trust; you broke my heart in pieces; you treated me like I was nothing.You told the world that I meant nothing to you.”
“The person you hurt wasn’t some TV character; you destroyed the real me.Someone who let you in and loved you, you tossed away like a used tissue.Don’t you understand what you meant to me?How did you think I was going to feel after what you did?You stole every bit of innocence I had left, Ryder.I trusted you with that girl, the one no one else gets to see.”
“You were vital to that girl, that girl that was never in the spotlight.That girl opened her heart and let you in.You made me fall in love with you, and then you just went away.Not only that but the way in which you did it, you humiliated me in front of the whole world.No, don’t touch me.I moved away when he reached out because I knew if he touched me, I would break down, and I wouldn’t get it all out.
“I was a laughingstock.I’m sure that you went through your own traumas or whatever, but that was your choice.How did I get dragged into it because you wanted to fuck Grandma and half of this depraved town?And now you’re here trying to drag me back into the middle of your mess again?”
“What is it that you’re expecting me to do?Are you expecting me to fight these people?These are some very dangerous people if what you’re saying is true.”
“It’s all true, believe me, I wouldn’t make up something like this, but first, we have to plan, we have to be very careful and plan, and the first thing I want to do is mend your heart.I’m the one who broke it, so I should be the one to put it back together.Call me whatever you want to, but I’m not taking no for an answer.I already told you in a song.”
Before I could open my mouth to blast him, both our phones dinged.I only picked mine up for something to do other than yelling back at him.“Oh damn!I guess you were telling the truth after all.”
‘What nondescript daughter of a barely there actor is auditioning for the role of immaculate conception?’
‘Sources say that the only way this F-list wanna-be model slash makeup guru could become with child is if the bodyguard was working overtime, since her A-list husband, who’s now getting his act together, has never graced her bed.Maybe her mother can cast a breeding spell, or she can buy herself a puppy to keep her company in the lonely days and nights to come.’
Beside the post was a picture of Janie and the post she’d made earlier claiming to be pregnant, along with one of those false pregnancy tummies they use in the movies.
“Oh shit!”Ryder laughed the words out, and I just stared at him as if he was the one on meds.What the hell is going on?
Chapter 45
*Elena*
If he’s telling the truth about this, does that mean that he’s being honest about everything else?I wasn’t anywhere close to forgiving him, but I can’t deny the fact that I was happy, elated even, that we were in the same room together after so many years apart, even though we were yelling at each other.
I hadn’t really let it set in entirely that he was really here, and it was now sinking in that we were this close to each other again after thinking for so long that this would never happen in this lifetime.I lost count of how many times in the beginning I imagined just this happening.How many times have I wished to wake up from the nightmare and realize that it was all just a dream until time passed by, and I gave up hope and stopped wishing?
I won’t deny to myself that I liked having him here, that being this close to him was the most alive I’ve felt in too long to remember.I won’t lie to myself about how it makes me feel, but no way in hell will I let him see or know it.
I’ve learned how to guard my feelings and keep them hidden from the world, and I doubt that I would ever trust him enough ever again to let myself be that open with him anyway.I’d grown a lot in the time we were apart, had told myself and anyone who would listen that I would never let myself be that vulnerable again, never let anyone make as big a fool of me as he did.
But now my heart is on fire, and my traitorous body that remembers him so well is crying out for his.But there’s a part of me that’s terrified of falling back into the same old rut.A part of me that dreads having my heart broken again by the only man who has the power to do it.I know myself when it comes to him, know that he’s my one weakness, and the problem is, he knows it too.
“Now, do you believe me?”
“About what?”
“Don’t play games, Elena.I meant the fact that I never touched her, not after we got married anyway.”
“Pfft.What does it matter?Besides, you could’ve hired this MengeLiNi person to do all this.”I didn’t believe that for a second, but anything to stall him.If we’re fighting, I won’t be so quick to give in, right?
“I already explained that about that.And stop calling me a liar.”