Page 61 of My Bully's Crush: Vol1
In the last few weeks, I’ve been tormented to no end, day after day.Each morning I dreaded waking up to face the new day because I never knew what new secret would be revealed to the world.Her information seemed to have no end, and no one could figure out as yet how she knew the things she was revealing, so there was no way to stop the flow.
As soon as we thought things were dying down, she’d come out with something else that was worse than the last, and the public was just eating it up.I’d graduated to hard drugs, but they weren’t doing much to numb my nerves because the onslaught was never-ending.
The threat of my every secret being revealed was something I could no longer handle, and I was at the end of my rope.What will she say next?Whose life will she destroy with her next move?I haven’t been out in days because there was no escape, but if I had to stay in this house alone with Ryder and his new friends, along with the new staff that he’d hired after getting rid of the people Mary and my dad had hired, I’d really lose my mind.
These people didn’t listen to me; in fact, they acted like I didn’t even exist, only taking orders from Ryder, and those two men, who I was more convinced daily, were not who they claimed to be.My phone dinged an alert.It was Elena’s, the alert I have on my phone that goes off whenever she’s in the news or mentioned online anywhere.
Mary’s phone went off at the same time, and we both read the latest at the same time.“Oh no, this is bad.”She turned and left without another word as I slumped into the nearest chair, feeling lifeless.
Why was Heather Saunders seen having lunch with Elena Gianni?Her husband was working with mine on a project together, so shouldn’t I be the one she was having lunch with?I’d done my research on that family after Ryder came back and knew that she was very selective in who she kept company with.She’s the true sense of Hollywood royalty, the type of woman people would sell their firstborn just to meet.
So what was she doing with her?And what did it have to do with my husband?The scream that I’d been holding in check for so long threatened to escape, and I had to dig my nails into my palms to keep myself grounded.
I got up and went in search of Ryder once my legs were steady enough.It’s time to put this thing to bed; time I get things back on track.I was surprised to see him coming towards me as I left the room where I’d met Mary.It had been some time since he’d come to my side of the house, and I felt a glimmer of hope at the smile he gave me.
“We need to talk.Come with me.”I was more surprised than any wife should be when he took my hand and led me back to the room I’d just left.Maybe things were about to turn around after all.Mom did say not to worry.
Chapter 37
*Janie*
I couldn’t take my eyes off his face as he led me into the room and sat me down on the loveseat, taking one of the chairs closest to it.Even with that initial smile, I was terrified about what he was about to say.
What if he asked for a divorce?What if everyone was right, and this was really the end?There was no way to read his face, not like in the past when the drugs kept him under control, and I didn’t have to worry from one day to the next what he was thinking.
“I want to apologize.”I think the world stopped.It wasn’t a declaration of love, but it might as well be.Ryder was saying sorry to me about something.It didn’t matter what it was he was apologizing for; just the fact that he was talking to me so nicely, too, was enough, and he wasn’t finished.
“I know I haven’t been the best husband, especially since I came back this last time, but I just wanted to get this acting thing right, and I couldn’t have any distractions.I see it as a new adventure for the both of us, and I wanted it to be right since I’ve made a mess of everything else.”
What?I had no idea he was thinking this way.“I thought you hated me; you’ve been so cold.I thought you blamed me….”
“No, no, of course not, it’s nothing like that.I’m sorry I made you feel that way.It’s just...I’ve noticed some things about myself once I got clean that I needed to work on, especially with you, with us.”
What is he saying?This is like a dream come true.Everyone was up in arms because he was off the drugs; they thought that once he came to his senses, he’d leave me and maybe worse, but I knew that he’d only remember how good I was to him; that was my hope all along anyway.
I wish my dad and Mary were here to hear this, but it’ll be just as fun when I call them later to tell them.I never should’ve doubted myself and the fact that I could get him to love me.I knew Mary was wrong when she said that it was only the drugs and the spells that had won him to my side.
How could I have forgotten how close we had become before the wedding?The fact that we had lied to him even then didn’t matter; I was sure that he’d started having feelings for me no matter what came after.I was so happy right now that even the fact that I hadn’t had sex with my husband in five years didn’t matter.I was sure that was about to change now too.
This is what I had been hoping for, what I’d dreamed of for so long, and here it was.Who cares about what everyone is saying online?When have I ever paid any attention to that crap?Mary was right when she said I’d only ever cared about myself and what I wanted.Why should anything else matter?
“I’m not sure how much you know about Chad Saunders, but he’s known to be a family man with very strong values when it comes to family.One of the things he made me promise when he helped get me clean was that I would keep my image spotless from now on.I knew that I’d done a lot of horrible things in our marriage, and I didn’t know how to make it up to you, so I needed some time.”
Now I get it; maybe that’s why his wife had met with Elena.She was calling that bitch off and probably figured out that she was the one behind these rumors that kept floating around about her and Ryder getting back together.I told everyone that song was for me; I was sure of it, but no one believed me.
They all claimed that it was all about Elena, thanks to that little bitch who’d claimed to have decoded the secret messages she said were in the song.It sounded pretty straightforward to me, though, and was all about how much he wanted us to spend the rest of our lives together.
I just knew that Ryder wouldn’t be stupid enough to sing about her while married to me, not even without the drugs.He wouldn’t want his fans, who he’d gone to such lengths to get to like me, to turn on him.And besides, he’d come back to me, hadn’t he?He could’ve gone anywhere else in the world, but in the end, I was the one he’d run back to.
I can’t wait to share that little tidbit either, to see the looks on everyone’s faces once they realized that I was right all along and that the beautiful song that everyone was saying was my husband’s best was, in fact, meant for me.It was his way of telling me that he was sorry and that he’d never want us to be apart ever.
“Here’s what I’ve been thinking.”When he leaned in close and took both my hands in his, I almost fainted.Ryder never touches me; in fact, he’d gone so far as to go out of his way so that we never even brushed up against each other in passing.Now here he was, holding my hands and looking into my eyes.
“I think we need to get away from here.Do you remember that house in the hills that you’ve always wanted?”I felt excitement burst forth and grow at the mention of the mansion I’d fallen in love with years ago.It was still on the market because of its high price, even in a town full of millionaires, which I always thought meant that it was meant to be mine.
Not to mention, that house is in Bel Air, which is an even ritzier neighborhood than where Mary and her daughters live in their little coven compound, as Mom jokingly calls it.
I could already see us there, living in the lap of luxury in the town’s most prestigious neighborhood.Not that our present home wasn’t also pricey, but that place was the end all and be all for anyone who was anyone in this town.A place only those who had truly made it could afford to live because it wasn’t just about the money; it was also about who you knew.Maybe this collab with Saunders was a gift in disguise after all and not the nightmare everyone was afraid of.