Page 6 of The Girl with No Name
“I’ll believe it when I see it. I’m not from the Instagram-is-real-life generation like you are. Where’d you meet her? Only AI Girlfriends?”
“She’s real, and she’s spectacular.”
“I bet. So…” Jay beats his hands on the desk, like he’s doing a drum roll. “You ready for the dad joke of the day?” He glances at the photo on his desk of his wife and two young kids.
“Hit me.”
“How do you make God laugh?”
“I don’t know. How?”
“You make a plan for your life.”
I can feel my brow furrow. “That doesn’t sound like a joke. Plus, that’s dumb. We need to plan our lives out. That’s how planning works.”
“Fuck you,” he counters. “It’s a dad joke, and it’s hilarious. I’m dropping so much wisdom you don’t even know.”
“I don’t get the joke part of the joke.”
“Happened to me, man. Thought I’d be a bachelor for life.” He leans back in his office chair, putting his arms behind his head. “Then I faked being my wife’s fiancé to piss off her ex. Turned out the sex was bomb, and she was the one. Now I nut in her every night, and it’s the best.”
“That’s disgusting. I’m going to call HR.”
“And tell them what? That I told you I like to fuck my wife? Grow some balls,flaca.”
“I feel like you’re trying to tell me something. Yes, I’m going to marry Samantha. She’s the one. Trust me.”
“Kidding, man! Why so serious? And how’s the sex with Samantha?”
“It’s fantastic. And personal. Thank you for asking!”
“I mean it’s gotta be hard to have when she’s two-thousand miles away.” Jay throws his hands up, palms toward me.
I pull out my Moleskine notebook with a pale blue cover and jot something down.
“Another song idea?” he asks.
“Yeah. ‘Why so serious?’ I can do something with that.”
“All right, enough of this relationship-chat bullshit. You ready to sell the fuck out of some software, motherfucker?” Jay pounds his desk.
“I can’t think of anything I’d rather be doing.”
“Really? Not a thing?”
I shrug. “I mean, I could use an adventure. Maybe sing some of my songs on the big stage? That’s the dream.”
“Dreams. I remember when I used to have those.” Jay looks at my notebook. “Sing one for me right now.”
“Not a chance.”
“Some proposal this is. I don’t even get a song?”
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“TIME BETWEEN” – THE BYRDS