Page 90 of Pucked Together

I still don't know how to react around him. He has memories of us together that just don't exist for me. It feels like we're standing at opposite ends of the same boat, just floating aimlessly toward some unknown destination.

I wish I could just feel. Feel everything I did for him when I let him make me his. Then maybe I'd feel...anything, really. Anything other than frustration and exhaustion.

His concerned eyes dance over my face. "You're sure about this, Iz?"

I look at Rina, who tilts her head, implying she's wondering the same thing.

"I need this," I tell him honestly.

He nods and sets the food down on Rina's desk. He looks like he wants to kiss me. But instead, he just places a tender hand on my shoulder as he walks back out.

"There's some for you too, Rina," he calls over his shoulder before closing the door.

"Lemme guess, vegan?" She scrunches her nose as I turn the bag and see the name of the restaurant and smile.

It's been almost a week since I moved in with Ryker. And the man doesn't let me out of his sight, just as he promised.

His brother is there too, even though I only see him occasionally since he lives in the pool house and is out looking for work nearly every day.

My brother, on the other hand, is there almost every day—along with Hicks and Fergie. It drives Ryker crazy. I can tell. But he's allowing it, for my sake. They make me laugh and watch cheesy rom-coms with me until I pass out, and Ryker can kick them out. They may as well be living in the house right along with me.

"Well, eat up," says Rina before pushing her chair back and rising. "I have some pre-game interviews to arrange before tonight. The boys will be hitting the ice any minute now if you want to get some practice shots in. Get familiar with the arena again."

"That sounds good," I tell her with a grateful smile.

"I'm glad you're back, Izzy." The way she says it sounds more like a friend than a boss. And it hits me in the chest. I've truly built a life here all these months.

"Thank you," is all I can say.

She grabs her phone, and her heels clack through her office. I can still hear her going down the hall after she's closed the door.

I look around the office and recall what Ryker said to me here right before I had my asthma attack less than a week ago.

"We are so past just friends it's not even fucking funny."

I quickly eat the Mediterranean dish Ryker had ordered for me. And rush out just in time to see the boys hit the ice.

I put the camera up to my eyes, snapping a few photos before looking down and adjusting the settings to work with the lighting. I bring the camera up to my eyes just as Trevor is skating up to me.

"Shit," I breathe out from the unexpected appearance. "Hey."

The last time I saw him in person was California, from what I remember. But I've pulled up articles from the last few months, and one in particular had caught my attention.

I see the scars from his brawl with Ryker across his brow when he removes his helmet.

"Hey, I just wanted to say...you know, hi."

There's a faint flutter in my chest. It's from nerves. I know it is. But seeing him here, I know what it's not.

I used to care for this man. I was about to marry him. But here we are. Our life choices have sent us down two very different paths.

"And congratulations," he continues, motioning to my belly. It's way too early to be showing, but it seems nobody can be around me without acknowledging the elephant in the room.

One of my hands shoots down instinctively to caress that area where I imagine my growing baby to be.

"Thank you," I say from behind the glass.

The sound of the other guys skating makes it hard to have a decent conversation. But Trevor and I talked it out. And I know now we were never going to work. He told me about what happened. And even as he did, the feeling of love I once had for him just wasn’t there.