Page 181 of The Pucking Coach's Daughter
Carter. The fact that he goes to SJU parties doesn’t even concern me. While we haven’t had any sort of exclusive talk—how could we, when I’m technically dating two… three… guys—I trust that he’s not doing anything stupid. But if he’s there, he could easily get swept up in a fight.
Especially as captain. He wouldn’t let his guys fight without him.
“I’m going with you?—”
“No.” Penn puts his hands on my shoulders. “Let me get him out of this, okay? The fight’s going to happen either way, but I can make sure he’s not part of it.”
A lump forms in my throat.
“Okay.” I try to remember how to breathe. “Okay, go.”
Penn kisses me. Too fast. “Ollie will take you home.”
“Penn—”
He’s gone. Disappearing through the crowd.
I’m left standing with Maddy and Dylan, feeling… lost. Worried.
More than a little nauseated.
I’ve seen Penn fight. And Oliver, too. But this seems like an intentional raid of a St. James party just to cause a fight. Players looking for blood. And it’s not even following up a game either of them lost against the other.
“You okay?” Dylan asks. “You went pale.”
They didn’t hear.
I wave them off and scan for Oliver. He’s still on the bleachers, high enough to keep eyes on me. Or at least, that’s what I tell myself in my state of delusion.
It’s dumb that I even care about him. That’s what it is, right? That weird thump in my heart whenever I see or think about Oliver Ruiz. It feels different than how my body reacts to Penn or Carter.
Carter Masters has always felt like some version of home. Safety. Even when he’s chasing me down in a parking garage or slicing my skin open with his knife, I trust him. The fling we had two years ago seems almost silly now. We were hot and heavy, from zero to one hundred. I secretly think it scared both of us, and that’s why we ended.
But the trust wasn’t broken… not until we set off the chain of events that landed me at Framingham State University.
How was I supposed to know those plays wouldn’t remain anonymous? How was Carter supposed to know that word about them would spread like wildfire?
And Penn… I find comfort in the way he’s never demanded more from me than what I’m capable of giving. Even in the beginning, when he threw cash at me before he fucked me. When more money mysteriously appeared in my drawer with the rest of my cash, my stockpile seeming to grow after every nighttime visit.
His threats didn’t curb my desire. The way he’s always watching out for me makes me feel seen, more than anything. Plus, his kinks are unexpected. Toe-curling at times.
He makes me believe that he will protect me in whatever way I need. And Oliver…
I don’t want to think about Oliver.
Oliver, who brought me to a rage room after terrifying me with a fake kidnapping, who stopped Bear from raping me, who then went on to… to simulate that very scenario again. But worse.
Oliver, who carefully laced up my skates for me. Who looks at me like he sees straight down into my soul. Who makes me think I’m not just broken pieces.
“Are we going out?” Maddy asks.
I shake my head slowly. The truth is, I’m so tired still. Always. I try to find Oliver again, but he’s moved from where he was before. I catch the top of his head, the corner of his ear, and my lips quirk.
Recognizing him from just that?
“I’m going to head home.” I hug her. Then Dylan, who’s still lingered even though the rest of her teammates are filing back toward the locker room. “Good job, Dyl. Proud of you.”
“Oh, stop it.” She hugs me back, though. “Thanks for coming.”