Page 19 of The Good Girl

Chapter 10

***

The next few days were like a dream. Jonas was more attentive than ever before and there was definitely something going on with him. He spent more time at the house now, even staying the night in my bed.

The only drawback was fighting off morning sickness or coming up with new innovative ways to evade him as I made a mad dash for the bathroom every morning. The first was impossible. There was no way to fend off morning sickness; the second was a little easier.

I’d convinced him that I was suffering from some sort of bug, but how long would that last? Plus he’d taken to studying me whenever we were in a room together without uttering a word. Nothing new there, but there was something in that look that made me twitch.

After that night, we’d gone back to the silent screw. He was trying hard to regain his discipline, but even though he gritted his teeth to hold his grunts of pleasure at bay, I still felt the change in him.

He was wilder now, and yet somehow gentler. He’d hold me each time after we made love and his embrace was as intimate as having him inside me. I hadn’t been called to the office for one of our hot and sweaty sessions lately because Rachel was back. Apparently she’d been ill that day she went missing, and I still didn’t know where Jonas had been that day but then again it wasn’t the first time he’d been away all day.

With things being the way they were I’d given up on my worrying for now, but the baby was still an issue that I wouldn’t be able to keep hidden for much longer. In a few short months I’ll start showing and then what.

***

Today had been a long day. All I wanted was to go home and put my feet up, watch something on television, and eat a whole tub of ice cream just for the hell of it.

I wasn’t sure if I was going to see Jonas tonight, I never know because he never tells me. I took a quick shower while dinner was cooking and sat alone afterward to eat my grilled chicken salad with a glass of tea as I pawed through a magazine.

I plopped down on the couch, something I don’t do often enough and turned the tube on, going from channel to channel for something good to watch. I caught one of those gossip shows that followed celebrities around and stopped there for a few minutes of mindless drivel before finding a good show to get lost in.

The on air reporter was on location at some gala or the other for the governor who was honoring the top students who’d taken part in some program that I missed the name of.

I was about to change the channel when I saw two familiar faces flash across the screen. My hand stopped midway to my mouth and I sat frozen until the ice cream melted onto my lap.

The picture on the screen grew fuzzy and I realized it was because I was crying. I jumped up from the couch when the need to throw up forced me to move and barely made it to the bathroom in time to lose the meal I’d just enjoyed.

I didn’t let myself think, didn’t try to convince myself of anything other than what I’d just seen with my own two eyes. I grabbed a few things, overlooking all the clothes he’d bought me and sticking to my own and shoved them into two suitcases.

I rushed around the room gathering anything I might need that he hadn’t bought, which wasn’t much. I wiped my face and shoved my feet into the closest thing I could find which happened to be my house slippers, but I didn’t care, I wanted out of there.

I thought of leaving a scathing goodbye note but the need to be gone was stronger, so I ran out to the garage and threw the luggage into the backseat. I had a moment’s pause about taking the car. It was his after all, but I had no other means of getting away. I’ll just find a way to get it back to him once I get out of here.

I had no idea where I was going. I had no one to turn to. No friends I could call on to put me up for the night. The tears refused to stop coming and I had to wipe my eyes too many times to count as I drove aimlessly for the first half hour.

Think Thalia, think. Our town wasn’t the smallest but it wasn’t a metropolis either. But I didn’t want to stay here. Come morning I wanted to be as far away from that snake as possible.

What had the last few days been about? What had they meant to him? Surely not what they meant to me. Not if he could have another woman on his arm at such a public event. Did that mean he was going to marry her? Was this his way of announcing to the public that she was his choice?

I bawled my eyes out, great wracking sobs tearing a hole in my chest as my mind went numb from the pain. I needed to think, needed to plan, but all I could see was Jonas looking so handsome in his designer tux with Rachel on his arm.

He’d done everything in his power to keep our relationship a secret, never taking any chances that we might be seen somewhere together. I’d hardly been out of the house in three months, and there he was just a week after meeting her, showing her off to the world. Flaunting their love for all to see.

I had to pull over when nausea threatened. Opening the car door I leaned out and dry heaved until I hurt. Oh no, the baby. I slammed the door and made myself breathe calmly. I looked around for an exit ramp. My throat was parched and raw and my brow was clammy. I needed to find a filling station or something so I could grab some water.

It’s amazing that I could think of such things through the pain in my heart. There was a tug of war going on inside of me. One side of my brain wanted to crawl into a hole and die, while the other kept insisting that I keep moving. It was like being torn in two, and the only thing that kept me from curling into myself and drifting away into nothingness, was the innocent child that was growing in my womb.

I found an off ramp up ahead and took it way too fast but there was hardly anyone on the highway. I pulled into the first filling station I came to and walked in almost in a daze. I headed to the back where the refrigerators were and grabbed a few bottles of water before reading the labels of some other stuff to see if it was safe for the baby.

I hate orange juice so that was out but I was pretty sure energy drinks were a no-no. If I’d gone to a doctor I would have a better handle on this, but I’d been putting it off until I found someone I could trust.

I grabbed some chocolate milk, some bananas and an apple and headed to the checkout. I paid for my stuff and ignored the grease ball behind the counter who tried chatting me up. I think if I was armed I would’ve shot him just on principle.

Back in the car I had calmed enough to use the GPS. I might not know where exactly I was going but I had a general idea. Something not too far for a night’s drive but far enough from here. I felt the need to be near the ocean so that’s where I headed. The Carolinas should be nice this time of year.

I used my phone to Google what I was looking for before putting an address into the system. Five hours ought to be far enough for now. Tomorrow or the next day, I’ll think of what to do next.