Page 104 of This Woman Forever

How long do these damn tests take to show a result?

I scan them again, bent over, watching closely for any change in the little window.

“Are you okay there?” Ava asks.

“I think they’re broken.” I register her next to me, looking at me, not the tests. She’d better drink some water. “We should do some more.” I move about an inch before my arm jars, Ava pulling me back.

“It’s been thirty seconds,” she says over an amused chuckle. Seconds? It feels like I’ve been bent over this unit for an hour. “Here, wash your hands.” She guides my hands under the tap, turning it on and rubbing at them. I keep my eyes on the tests. Is that a letter I can see? I crane my neck, scowling when I note it’s a shadow.

“It’s been longer than that.” For fuck’s sake, they’re definitely broken. “Much longer.”

“No, it hasn’t. Stop being neurotic.” She releases me and mirrors my bent frame, and I look out the corner of my eye, well aware she’s making fun of me.

She grins. It’s beautiful. She’s about to have it confirmed beyond all doubt that she is carrying my child, and she’s grinning. I don’t know what’s changed, but I’m fucking grateful. “I’m not neurotic.”

“Of course you’re not.” Her dark hair falls over her shoulders, skimming her nipples. How the hell am I still standing here and not carrying her to the bed?

“Are you taking the piss out of me, lady?”

“Not at all.” Her lips twitch. “My Lord.”

She’s got that right. Her Lord, her God, her everything.

What the fuck is wrong with these tests?

This is ridiculous. If she’s pregnant, the baby will be here before these fucking tests tell us she’s on her way. I inhale subtly. She? Would I get the privilege of having a little girl again? Would I?—

My thoughts pause when I notice a change in the window of the first test. I lean in more, blink my eyes so I don’t have to blink them again anytime soon. Is that a P?

I feel every muscle and limb stiffen, my lungs inflating, my breath held. Is that an R? I quickly check the other two tests. More letters. Fucking hell. I stare, my eyes burning, not daring to blink, as a whole word slowly forms before my eyes.

Pregnant.

I snap my eyes to the second.

Pregnant.

My heart bucks, and I quickly check the last test.

Pregnant.

Jesus.

Pregnant, pregnant, pregnant.

We’re pregnant.

My whole body starts to shake, and I absolutely cannot control it. Pregnant. Swallowing, struggling for air, I turn my wide eyes onto Ava. She’s still bent over too. Smiling mildly, watching me process what I’m seeing.

Pregnant.

“Hi, Daddy,” she breathes, her lip definitely wobbling. Like my body.

Daddy.

“Fuck... me.” I asked for this. Prayed for this. Manipulated everything for this to happen. And now it has? “I can’t breathe.” Or stand. My legs fail me, and I crumble to the floor, breathless, full of so many more emotions, I’m not sure where to start sorting them out.

“Are you okay?” Ava’s quiet, unsure question wakes me from my trance, and I look at her. I don’t see just Ava, though. I see... my family. I see a second chance. I see an opportunity to make right what went so horribly wrong.