Page 40 of Queen of Misfortune (Shadows of Redemption)
Luckily, distraction can help keep it at bay. When I go down for breakfast, the house is awash with activity preparing for a wedding. Elena is radiant as she jumps up from the dining room table to hug me.
“It’s today. Niko has arranged everything.”
“How exciting. How can I help?” Focusing on others always works to keep my pity parties at bay.
“You’ll be my matron of honor, right?”
“Right.” God, who is standing up for Niko? Probably Donovan. Ugh. “Who is the best man?”
“Liam. It was going to be Donovan too, but he’s taking care of all the security today.”
Thank God.
Elena frowns. “Are you all right? You look… I don’t know, sad?”
I plaster on a smile. “What’s there to be sad about? My sister is getting married and it’s for the right reasons. She’s in love.”
Her smile is radiant. “I can’t believe it. I’m so lucky Niko found me.”
“Kidnapped you, you mean.”
She gives me a sly grin. “It’s a good thing I sold him my virginity.”
I still can’t believe she did that. In her desperation to escape my father, she’d done something so over the top crazy. And yet, because of it, she is here, happier than I’ve ever seen her. Maybe I need to do something crazy. The image of Donovan between my legs flashes in my mind. I give my head a shake. That wasn’t crazy. It was stupid.
I spend the rest of the morning helping Elena get ready for her wedding. She stands in front of the mirror and studies herself, her hand on her belly.
“Mom was so mad that my dress didn’t fit right when I was supposed to marry Romeo,” she says.
“You were pregnant then?”
“Yes, but I’d been losing weight. She told me to just lie down and do whatever Romeo wanted. That it would be easier.” Sheturns to me. “She never knew relations between a man and woman could be loving and pleasurable for both.”
I scoffed. “She married Dad. He doesn’t know how to love, and I’m sure didn’t care about her pleasure. Hell, she’s not much different from him.”
Her eyes soften. “She was like us… a woman without agency, turned hard by a lifetime?—”
“Don’t, Elena.” I can’t hear her try to justify our mother.
“What?”
“She is as bad as him. Trust me on this.” I’d spent so much time caring for and protecting Elena, and part of that was keeping truths from her. Truths about our mother.
“But she didn’t have a choice?—”
“She had plenty of choices.” My voice is teetering on rage, so I pull it back. “This is your wedding day. Focus on that.”
She studies me for a moment but then nods and turns back to the mirror. “Was your wedding nice?”
I was terrified when I arrived at my wedding. Even seeing Giuseppe old and infirm didn’t alleviate my fear that he’d hurt me. We were married several months, with me tending him every day, before I understood he wouldn’t hurt me. After that, we forged a sweet friendship.
“It was lovely,” I lie. “Now, you need something borrowed, so here is a necklace that Giuseppe gave me.”
Elena’s eyes tear up. “Pearls. Oh, and a sapphire. It’s beautiful.”
“It’s borrowed, blue, and something old. I’m not sure that’s how the tradition is supposed to work… but we’re under the gun. We just need something new.”
Elena laughs. “You take such good care of me.”